How do you like THAT? - Page 3

regular.joe · 02-08-2008, 07:14 PM

O.K. I didn't read all the posts, I'm pissed off. The MAN needs to grow a nutsack, and get over his "emotions" and do the right thing. The right thing being teaching the class he said he would.

Cloud · 02-08-2008, 08:10 PM

so sucky. I'm tempted to suggest that you stand up in front of the class and make a scene. Oh, but you said you didn't want to antagonize him . . .

Seriously, look for an advocate and don't give up. Bureaucracy is a bitch.

monster · 02-08-2008, 08:28 PM

It totally sucks, but:

::dons cellar-wrath-proof-armor::

Did he mention it was your cancer that was causing him the emotional distress? You didn't say that.

He's your favorite prof. You like him as a man, too. I suspect this is the guy you've mentioned before. You cried when he asked you to withdraw and said that it's "all you have". (That may be true, although I suspect you have many other things too, but either way, it's a helluva package to hand someone who'd just trying to do their job).

You are auditing the course, but asking him to make exceptions and grade your paper.

You almost read "date" into a discussion over a cup of coffee. I never went to a supervision in the UK that didn't involve a cup of coffee and we're a nation of tea-drinkers. it's a universal safe phrase -in most circumstances.

Maybe he did mean "date" by the cup of coffee. You like him as a man, if he likes you, you can't be his student if it's going to progress.

I sucks to hell and back, but maybe he has a point. You're clearly pretty emotionally dependant on him and this link to normality in what is currently a completely fucked-up world for you. None of that is wrong or abnormal, but it's a HUGE thing for you to ask him to deal with professionally. And if he fancies you too, it's even huger.

It totally totally sucky, but probably the best course for him if not you both. For sure take it further if you think you have a case -I think Shawnee's advice is awesome, but just be truly aware of what you are getting into. Is it really the cancer at the root of this, or something more ....ahem...personal? If it's the former, go for it with guns blazing. If maybe there's even a hint of the latter, be careful and decide what your absolute optimal outcome is before opening fire.

monster · 02-08-2008, 08:31 PM

Oh and -they're all right about the Financial aid thing -fight that loss tooth and nail -regardless of whether you choose to withdraw from the class of fight the prof. Separete issues. Totally. If he asked you to withdraw for emotional reasons, that has nothing to do with eligability for Financial Aid.

xoxoxoBruce · 02-08-2008, 11:04 PM

Slip some chemo in his coffee.

Aliantha · 02-09-2008, 01:20 AM

Dazza dated students once or twice. It's completely above board over here as long as the lecturer/tutor states what's going on and the students papers are subject to review if anyone queries the grading.

I think things are slightly different when it comes to uni etc. It's not the same as school.

Elspode · 02-09-2008, 01:23 AM

I didn't read all of this either, so I'm sure I missed something...but...

This isn't the same fuckwit you were doing in the past, is it?

xoxoxoBruce · 02-09-2008, 01:38 AM

No, see post 16.

skysidhe · 02-09-2008, 02:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna

'assertive woman who refuses to be treated like dirt',

There is that one glaring truth among a paragraph of consessions.

Bri,
Refusing to be treated like this dosn't make you a bitch. It makes you a strong human. You have the right to be treated with dignity and no you don't want to settle for a push and a wink regardless of what your lying heart is telling you. Go with the gut.

Trilby · 02-09-2008, 05:19 AM

Monster--I am NOT currently auditing the class. I've never audited a class and I only asked if that includes grading my paper or do I even need to write one. I wasn't saying, "I"m auditing but I expect special treatment and for you to go against rules and grade my paper." I don't know if its my cancer that is bothering him or something else--he didn't specify. He just said he's emotionally involved and it's effecting his teaching-"Making it difficult to teach my class," is what he said. He has been very kind to me in the past and has said i am one of his favorite students. I don't want to go into this with guns blazing---I just want the right to be in a class I paid for.

monster · 02-09-2008, 09:57 AM

Sorry Bri, I obviously got confused. If you paid to attend this class then you are fully entitled to take it unless you are physically disrupting the class. You should persue it, and you should be able to do it without all guns blazing. I would assume (but it's not like I've never been wrong) that the "disability" services are able to deal with such things discretely -it's bad enough having an extra battle to fight without being made an example of. Good luck, I'm sorry, I'm about as much use as a chocolate teapot, and when I tried to look at it from the other side I only succeeded in pissing you off. I just find it incredible that he could behave like that. I'm sorry, again. I'll STFU now.

Trilby · 02-09-2008, 10:00 AM

no worries--i just wanted to be clear that i never have asked for special favors from any prof---ever. I know a lot of whiney students who think the world revolves around them but I am truly not one of them--the rules are laid down and I go by them--if I miss class and am docked, I don't come mewling with some damn story or other---I take my lumps. I like the chocolate teapot idea, though!

lumberjim · 02-09-2008, 10:39 AM

he asked you to leave?

say no.

Trilby · 02-09-2008, 10:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lumberjim

he asked you to leave?

say no.

Yeah, but how uncomfortable would that be, sitting in a class with a prof giving you the evil eye, staring daggers, what have you. If I'm not wanted, I either litagate or cry. In this instance, I cried (with lots of snot) and he was NOT MOVED.

lumberjim · 02-09-2008, 11:06 AM

THEN FUCK HIM. and i don't mean fuck him.

02-08-2008, 07:14 PM	#31
regular.joe Старый сержант Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: NC, dreaming of large Russian women. Posts: 1,464	O.K. I didn't read all the posts, I'm pissed off. The MAN needs to grow a nutsack, and get over his "emotions" and do the right thing. The right thing being teaching the class he said he would. __________________ Birth, wealth, and position are valueless during wartime. Man is only judged by his character --Soldier's Testament. Death, like birth, is a secret of Nature. - Marcus Aurelius.

02-08-2008, 08:10 PM	#32
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	so sucky. I'm tempted to suggest that you stand up in front of the class and make a scene. Oh, but you said you didn't want to antagonize him . . . Seriously, look for an advocate and don't give up. Bureaucracy is a bitch. __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"

02-08-2008, 08:28 PM	#33
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	It totally sucks, but: ::dons cellar-wrath-proof-armor:: Did he mention it was your cancer that was causing him the emotional distress? You didn't say that. He's your favorite prof. You like him as a man, too. I suspect this is the guy you've mentioned before. You cried when he asked you to withdraw and said that it's "all you have". (That may be true, although I suspect you have many other things too, but either way, it's a helluva package to hand someone who'd just trying to do their job). You are auditing the course, but asking him to make exceptions and grade your paper. You almost read "date" into a discussion over a cup of coffee. I never went to a supervision in the UK that didn't involve a cup of coffee and we're a nation of tea-drinkers. it's a universal safe phrase -in most circumstances. Maybe he did mean "date" by the cup of coffee. You like him as a man, if he likes you, you can't be his student if it's going to progress. I sucks to hell and back, but maybe he has a point. You're clearly pretty emotionally dependant on him and this link to normality in what is currently a completely fucked-up world for you. None of that is wrong or abnormal, but it's a HUGE thing for you to ask him to deal with professionally. And if he fancies you too, it's even huger. It totally totally sucky, but probably the best course for him if not you both. For sure take it further if you think you have a case -I think Shawnee's advice is awesome, but just be truly aware of what you are getting into. Is it really the cancer at the root of this, or something more ....ahem...personal? If it's the former, go for it with guns blazing. If maybe there's even a hint of the latter, be careful and decide what your absolute optimal outcome is before opening fire. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

02-08-2008, 08:31 PM	#34
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Oh and -they're all right about the Financial aid thing -fight that loss tooth and nail -regardless of whether you choose to withdraw from the class of fight the prof. Separete issues. Totally. If he asked you to withdraw for emotional reasons, that has nothing to do with eligability for Financial Aid. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

02-08-2008, 11:04 PM	#35
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Slip some chemo in his coffee. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

02-09-2008, 01:20 AM	#36
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Dazza dated students once or twice. It's completely above board over here as long as the lecturer/tutor states what's going on and the students papers are subject to review if anyone queries the grading. I think things are slightly different when it comes to uni etc. It's not the same as school. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

02-09-2008, 01:23 AM	#37
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	I didn't read all of this either, so I'm sure I missed something...but... This isn't the same fuckwit you were doing in the past, is it? __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

02-09-2008, 01:38 AM	#38
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	No, see post 16. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

02-09-2008, 05:19 AM	#40
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Monster--I am NOT currently auditing the class. I've never audited a class and I only asked if that includes grading my paper or do I even need to write one. I wasn't saying, "I"m auditing but I expect special treatment and for you to go against rules and grade my paper." I don't know if its my cancer that is bothering him or something else--he didn't specify. He just said he's emotionally involved and it's effecting his teaching-"Making it difficult to teach my class," is what he said. He has been very kind to me in the past and has said i am one of his favorite students. I don't want to go into this with guns blazing---I just want the right to be in a class I paid for.

02-09-2008, 09:57 AM	#41
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Sorry Bri, I obviously got confused. If you paid to attend this class then you are fully entitled to take it unless you are physically disrupting the class. You should persue it, and you should be able to do it without all guns blazing. I would assume (but it's not like I've never been wrong) that the "disability" services are able to deal with such things discretely -it's bad enough having an extra battle to fight without being made an example of. Good luck, I'm sorry, I'm about as much use as a chocolate teapot, and when I tried to look at it from the other side I only succeeded in pissing you off. I just find it incredible that he could behave like that. I'm sorry, again. I'll STFU now. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

02-09-2008, 10:00 AM	#42
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	no worries--i just wanted to be clear that i never have asked for special favors from any prof---ever. I know a lot of whiney students who think the world revolves around them but I am truly not one of them--the rules are laid down and I go by them--if I miss class and am docked, I don't come mewling with some damn story or other---I take my lumps. I like the chocolate teapot idea, though!

02-09-2008, 10:39 AM	#43
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	he asked you to leave? say no. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

02-09-2008, 11:06 AM	#45
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	THEN FUCK HIM. and i don't mean fuck him. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

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