A Poem. Please review. - Page 2

lookout123 · 04-27-2005, 04:26 PM

LOOKOUT

no, no,no, get up off the floor - i was just saying my name.

Trilby · 04-27-2005, 04:37 PM

I can't tell you my real name. I'm in the Vic. Wit. program. I don't really live in Ohio, either.

Happy Monkey · 04-27-2005, 04:40 PM

Ow! Disillusionment! But you DO live in pizza, right?

Trilby · 04-27-2005, 04:43 PM

Right.

footfootfoot · 04-27-2005, 06:54 PM

did I miss the poem or the joke?

lookout123 · 04-27-2005, 08:31 PM

apparently we in the cellar are very immature and rude, so angus has deleted all of his posts. i think you can still free to send all of your money to the grand pubah of the utopian society though.

Trilby · 04-27-2005, 09:04 PM

If you really care, the poem kinda went:

I wish life was more like yogurt
It's a shame I'm not Humphrey Bogart.

Like that.

xoxoxoBruce · 04-30-2005, 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrnoodle

Angus O'Mann, Poet Laureate, New Utopia

Whatever his mental state or other hangups, he has a fancier name than any of you morons. With the possible exception of Carbonated Brains. I like to say "Carbonated Brains."

You misunderstood;
not Angus O'Mann
it's Angry Old Man
with that beatnik attitude, *my poetry is cool, you just aren't hip enough to dig it, square*.

I've seen similar attitudes in the philosophy thread.

Elspode · 04-30-2005, 12:40 PM

My favorite poem was written by a friend of mine for his English class back in about 1973, when we were all drug-addled hippies in high school.

"Drugs...I need 'em like a summer's day.
Get down...boogie. Oh fwow, man.
Give me drugs or I'll kill you."

Needless to say, my friend went on to be a rock star during the 80's as bass player for the Rainmakers. He was long on sarcasm and short on being terribly serious.

Trilby · 05-01-2005, 11:00 AM

IIRC Angus O'Mann said sarcasm was EASY, man. I'm gonna so totally remember that.

staceyv · 05-08-2005, 08:33 AM

Well, since you erased your poem, I'll just add my own:

My shift was so ruthless and evil last night,
I came home and I cried ‘till I slept.
The way people treated me just wasn’t right,
I got tips that were low and completely inept,
I lost money, my feet hurt, I wept and I wept.

I got an eight dollar tip on a hundred buck tab,
On the next table - ten on the same
It’s as if they took a knife and proceeded to stab
Through my soul and my spirit, my heart and my brain,
I thought I gave them great service- it’s really a shame.

I smiled, I chatted, I walked back and forth,
I was prompt, polite and so attentive,
I got orders correct and was a good food whore,
I was screwed like one too- that’s inventive.
I thought tips were my supposed incentive.

I gave one table a check that was ten bucks too cheap,
That’s because it wasn’t even theirs.
But they left and my pockets, I dug into deep,
Lost my tip and ten bucks- but I gained some gray hairs.
That’s the third reason I fell asleep drenched in tears.

Then I waited on a couple from Fall River, I think,
A macho man and his dippy, mute ho.
They wanted for nothing- always had a drink,
I gave them great service- I really thought so,
At the end, though, I didn’t receive any dough.

I got screwed and abused like a cheap gutter whore,
-Tried to please them with all that I had,
All in vain, though, because I am still very poor,
And I’ve lost faith in people, it’s sad,
I’m just used up, stressed out and raving mad.

Trilby · 05-10-2005, 08:01 AM

Stacey, I can honestly say that not only do I enjoy your posts, but I thoroughly enjoy your poems, too. I know you're stressed out, used up and raving mad, but your also very, very funny.

Catwoman · 05-10-2005, 08:11 AM

I second that!

lookout123 · 05-10-2005, 10:38 AM

good work staceyv. and i really do believe you need to look for a new restaurant to work at. this one seems to draw a fat lot of losers.

staceyv · 05-12-2005, 06:43 AM

My coworkers seem to find amusement in my ravings, too. They think it's funny when I flip out and start swearing like I have Tourette's syndrome. At least SOMEthing good comes out of my twisted mental state...

04-27-2005, 04:26 PM	#16
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	LOOKOUT no, no,no, get up off the floor - i was just saying my name. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

04-27-2005, 04:37 PM	#17
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	I can't tell you my real name. I'm in the Vic. Wit. program. I don't really live in Ohio, either. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

04-27-2005, 04:40 PM	#18
Happy Monkey I think this line's mostly filler. Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: DC Posts: 13,575	Ow! Disillusionment! But you DO live in pizza, right? __________________ _________________ \|...............\| We live in the nick of times. \| Len 17, Wid 3 \| \|_______________\| [pics]

04-27-2005, 04:43 PM	#19
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Right. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

04-27-2005, 06:54 PM	#20
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	did I miss the poem or the joke? __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

04-27-2005, 08:31 PM	#21
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	apparently we in the cellar are very immature and rude, so angus has deleted all of his posts. i think you can still free to send all of your money to the grand pubah of the utopian society though. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

04-27-2005, 09:04 PM	#22
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	If you really care, the poem kinda went: I wish life was more like yogurt It's a shame I'm not Humphrey Bogart. Like that. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

04-30-2005, 12:40 PM	#24
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	My favorite poem was written by a friend of mine for his English class back in about 1973, when we were all drug-addled hippies in high school. "Drugs...I need 'em like a summer's day. Get down...boogie. Oh fwow, man. Give me drugs or I'll kill you." Needless to say, my friend went on to be a rock star during the 80's as bass player for the Rainmakers. He was long on sarcasm and short on being terribly serious. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

05-01-2005, 11:00 AM	#25
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	IIRC Angus O'Mann said sarcasm was EASY, man. I'm gonna so totally remember that. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

05-08-2005, 08:33 AM	#26
staceyv Lecturer Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Ohio Posts: 927	Well, since you erased your poem, I'll just add my own: My shift was so ruthless and evil last night, I came home and I cried ‘till I slept. The way people treated me just wasn’t right, I got tips that were low and completely inept, I lost money, my feet hurt, I wept and I wept. I got an eight dollar tip on a hundred buck tab, On the next table - ten on the same It’s as if they took a knife and proceeded to stab Through my soul and my spirit, my heart and my brain, I thought I gave them great service- it’s really a shame. I smiled, I chatted, I walked back and forth, I was prompt, polite and so attentive, I got orders correct and was a good food whore, I was screwed like one too- that’s inventive. I thought tips were my supposed incentive. I gave one table a check that was ten bucks too cheap, That’s because it wasn’t even theirs. But they left and my pockets, I dug into deep, Lost my tip and ten bucks- but I gained some gray hairs. That’s the third reason I fell asleep drenched in tears. Then I waited on a couple from Fall River, I think, A macho man and his dippy, mute ho. They wanted for nothing- always had a drink, I gave them great service- I really thought so, At the end, though, I didn’t receive any dough. I got screwed and abused like a cheap gutter whore, -Tried to please them with all that I had, All in vain, though, because I am still very poor, And I’ve lost faith in people, it’s sad, I’m just used up, stressed out and raving mad.

05-10-2005, 08:01 AM	#27
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Stacey, I can honestly say that not only do I enjoy your posts, but I thoroughly enjoy your poems, too. I know you're stressed out, used up and raving mad, but your also very, very funny. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

05-10-2005, 08:11 AM	#28
Catwoman stalking a Tom Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: on the edge of the english channel Posts: 1,000	I second that! __________________ I've decided I'm not going to have a signature anymore.

05-10-2005, 10:38 AM	#29
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	good work staceyv. and i really do believe you need to look for a new restaurant to work at. this one seems to draw a fat lot of losers. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

05-12-2005, 06:43 AM	#30
staceyv Lecturer Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Ohio Posts: 927	My coworkers seem to find amusement in my ravings, too. They think it's funny when I flip out and start swearing like I have Tourette's syndrome. At least SOMEthing good comes out of my twisted mental state...

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