Humor...I Need Humor... - Page 300

classicman · 06-27-2012, 02:37 PM

Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning

A small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery.
Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 2826 bodies so far
and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.

Spexxvet · 06-27-2012, 06:21 PM

My sister's plane crashed into an Irish cemetery and she died on 9/11 you insensitive bastard.

Sheldonrs · 06-27-2012, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

My sister's plane crashed into an Irish cemetery and she died on 9/11 you insensitive bastard.

Your sister was a terrorist?

regular.joe · 06-27-2012, 09:28 PM

Terror, Terror, Gay Marriage...be afraid.

Rhianne · 06-30-2012, 03:08 PM

I bought a strobe light today but when I got the thing back home it refused to work on any of the different settings.

I went back to the store. "Have you tried switching it off and on?" asked the assistant.

DanaC · 07-03-2012, 09:40 AM

from Private Eye magazine

Gravdigr · 07-03-2012, 01:18 PM

Gravdigr · 07-04-2012, 04:43 PM

One day a five year old asks his dad "Daddy, can I have new bicycle?"

The father responds "Can your dick touch your asshole?"

Confused, the boy says "No.", and the dad says "Well, there's your answer."

At 12, the boy again asks "Dad, can I have new bicycle?"

Again, the dad responds with "Can your dick touch your asshole?"

And again, the boy says "No.", and the dad says "Well, there's your answer."

At eighteen the boy asks "Dad, can I have a new car?"

The dad asks "Can your dick touch your asshole?"

The boy responds "As a matter of fact, it can."

The dad says "Good, now go fuck yourself."

monster · 07-16-2012, 08:44 PM

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DanaC · 07-18-2012, 06:44 PM

Grav...the key word there is 'possible'

:p

ZenGum · 07-19-2012, 07:42 AM

Damn, Grav, you got burned there!

and you're a plagiarist.

Gravdigr · 07-19-2012, 04:38 PM

Well, I plagiarized because if I posted the picture I had, you would have been bangin Emma Watson. And that ain't nearly as awesome!

Plus, it would have offended some people.

Ya know whut? Long as I'm getting pinched...

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Gravdigr · 07-19-2012, 04:41 PM

And, I'm trying very hard not to think about Mr. Grint.

[shudder]

Sheldonrs · 07-19-2012, 09:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gravdigr

And, I'm trying very hard not to think about Mr. Grint.

[shudder]

Would it help knowing that in yet another universe, I am banging you while dressed as Pennywise the Clown?

Gravdigr · 07-21-2012, 06:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sheldonrs

Would it help knowing that in yet another universe, I am banging you while dressed as Pennywise the Clown?

Wait, I confuse easily...Is it me or you dressed like the clown? And which of us would be the assclown?

Wait again...Is this a universe of Pennywise Assclowns we speak of?!

06-27-2012, 02:37 PM	#1
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning A small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 2826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

06-27-2012, 06:21 PM	#2
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	My sister's plane crashed into an Irish cemetery and she died on 9/11 you insensitive bastard. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

06-27-2012, 09:28 PM	#4
regular.joe Старый сержант Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: NC, dreaming of large Russian women. Posts: 1,464	Terror, Terror, Gay Marriage...be afraid. __________________ Birth, wealth, and position are valueless during wartime. Man is only judged by his character --Soldier's Testament. Death, like birth, is a secret of Nature. - Marcus Aurelius.

07-03-2012, 01:18 PM	#7
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	__________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

07-04-2012, 04:43 PM	#8
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	One day a five year old asks his dad "Daddy, can I have new bicycle?" The father responds "Can your dick touch your asshole?" Confused, the boy says "No.", and the dad says "Well, there's your answer." At 12, the boy again asks "Dad, can I have new bicycle?" Again, the dad responds with "Can your dick touch your asshole?" And again, the boy says "No.", and the dad says "Well, there's your answer." At eighteen the boy asks "Dad, can I have a new car?" The dad asks "Can your dick touch your asshole?" The boy responds "As a matter of fact, it can." The dad says "Good, now go fuck yourself." __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

06-30-2012, 03:08 PM	#5
Rhianne Nearly done. Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Teetering on the edge. Posts: 1,134	I bought a strobe light today but when I got the thing back home it refused to work on any of the different settings. I went back to the store. "Have you tried switching it off and on?" asked the assistant.

07-16-2012, 08:44 PM	#9
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	__________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

07-19-2012, 07:42 AM	#11
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	Damn, Grav, you got burned there! and you're a plagiarist. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

07-19-2012, 04:38 PM	#12
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Well, I plagiarized because if I posted the picture I had, you would have been bangin Emma Watson. And that ain't nearly as awesome! Plus, it would have offended some people. Ya know whut? Long as I'm getting pinched... __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

07-19-2012, 04:41 PM	#13
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	And, I'm trying very hard not to think about Mr. Grint. [shudder] __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

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