12/22/2002: Word usage maps

[wolf]

I'm glad you got over that Maggie! (Bet you are too ...)

There is an inappropriate question I've asked several of my friends ... did you lose the ability to parallel park, and develop an urge to stop for directions? (Best answer so far: "I couldn't parallel park before ...")

[MaggieL]

Originally posted by wolf

There is an inappropriate question I've asked several of my friends ... did you lose the ability to parallel park, and develop an urge to stop for directions? (Best answer so far: "I couldn't parallel park before ...")

Well, you're right about that one. I was never very good at parallel parking. And yet I seem to taxi airplanes with reasonable dexterity.

As for stopping for directions, I'm still resistant to that--my experience so far has been that the people who are available for such questions (gas station attendants, convenience store clerks) seldom know their local geography very well, and worse, can't be relied on to admit they don't know when they don't. I have a lifelong love of cartography and navigation; asking for directions seems like cheating somehow. Perhaps that's a rationalization, but to the extent that the resistance is gender-based, I think it is it is most likely a matter of socialization.

My daddy the preacher resisted having any other family member able to drive *his* car...only when diabetic retinopathy disabled him did my mother learn to drive. One of my big acts of adolescent rebellion was to buy a used motorcycle shortly after dropping out of college and learn to ride it on the church lawn. The very day my learner's permit arrived, I set out on a road trip to visrt my girlfriend.

In Chestertown, Maryland (a college town on the eastern shore, a distance of about 80 miles)
At night.
In the rain.
In October.

It was quite a ride, and yet I only made one wrong turn. Interestingly enough, the first leg of my "long solo cross-country", one of the rites of passage of a student pilot, followed approximately the same route as that jaunt en route to Salsbury MD. "As the crow flies" is a bit easier, though.

I'm much better about asking for help when shopping, although still not at the level of helplessness some people expect of females. I have especially enjoyed some of my encounters with Radio Shack clerks, though, whether shopping for baterries or obscure antenna parts for our amateur radio stations. It's good dirty fun to ambush them with an actual knowlege of electronics.

[elSicomoro]

I grew up in a city, where it was necessary to parallel park. Yet, I failed it on my drivers test, and still can't do it very well to this day...even with a Geo Metro. In fact, I think I was better at parking my Chevy Caprice than the Metro. That is sad.

[wolf]

Must agree with you on the directions thing ... definitely a matter of personal style ... I'll stop any buy a map before I'll ask for directions, but then I was a geography and planning major in college.

As far as parking goes ... I'm a grad of the Stevie Wonder school of parallel parking. I don't do too bad, but thats mostly because I took a couple classes in grad school in a building that the best parking for was on-street metered parking. :P

I didn't have to learn it for my driver's exam ... Norristown Barracks didn't make you parallel park. But man, am I good at three point turns ...

And syc ... sometimes with a larger car you have a better idea of what spaces you'll fit in. With a smaller car, you sometimes try for spots that are about six inches too short.

[99 44/100% pure]

Originally posted by wolf
... I'm a grad of the Stevie Wonder school of parallel parking.

Hah! I'm a graduate of the NYC school of parallel parking, which teaches that you back up till you hit the bumper of the car behind you, then pull up till you hit the bumper of the car in front of you, and so on, till you're in.

This appalls my beau, who believes that glove boxes were invented in order to stash the gun that will be used without question on anyone who so much as looks funny at his vehicle, which happens to be a ten-year-old pickup truck.

Well, isn't that what bumpers are for? Of course, this technique doesn't work so well nowadays, with everyone's car rigged to explode into an earsplitting din if so much as caressed by a light breeze.

[elSicomoro]

Perhaps the spatial distortion concept comes into play there, Wolf...

I just find it funny that I could squeeze that big bastard into a spot on one of Chicago's small streets, yet I have the worst time parking a Metro in a decent-sized spot along Market Street in Philadelphia. In fact, the Caprice is the only car I was able to parallel park halfway-decent, out of the dozen or so cars I've owned/driven on a regular basis (from a 1973 Chrysler New Yorker to the Metro).

[wolf]

Originally posted by 99 44/100% pure

This appalls my beau, who believes that glove boxes were invented in order to stash the gun that will be used without question on anyone who so much as looks funny at his vehicle, which happens to be a ten-year-old pickup truck.

IMHO, it's called a sidearm because one wears it on one's side ... the glove box is way too far to reach.

And what would you do if you were outside the vehicle when someone looked funny at it?

Besides, where would you keep your gloves?

Oh, wait. Didn't you say you were in Baltimore? No wonder you can't carry. Nevermind.

[slang]

Originally posted by 99 44/100% pure
This appalls my beau, who believes that glove boxes were invented in order to stash the gun that will be used without question on anyone who so much as looks funny at his vehicle, which happens to be a ten-year-old pickup truck.

(The Cliff Clavin side of slang’s personality emerges)

It’s a little known fact that both the automotive glovebox and the automotive “roof” were both intended for use with firearms. The glovebox was originally sized to hold a Colt 1911 as well as a Colt 38 caliber revolver simultaneously. The original roof was designed as a platform for turret mounted Thompson sub guns and the interior had controls to allow the front passenger to control the firing and aiming of the guns. In fact, the Ford motor company had promoted this feature heavily in their brochures. Unfortunately for Ford, at that time the general public was granted their God given right to bear arms per the second amendment and generally didn’t feel the need for the turrets because they were quite content to tote their Tommy guns. Sadly, after the firearms control act of 1934, which mayor Daley pushed for to prevent the average Joe from interfering with mob activity, the feature was seen as irrelevant. The manufacturing for the “roof” also had some other usefulness though and was continued after the ban.

[99 44/100% pure]

Wow, I didn't know that! (she said, despite her proclivity for being infrequently astonished.) I love how I learn something new here every day.

Just think, if the evolution of the design of cars as personal armament extensions had continued to the present day, that kid wouldn't have had to squeeze into the trunk to shoot all those folks in Virginia and Maryland!

[wolf]

Originally posted by slang
It’s a little known fact that both the automotive glovebox and the automotive “roof” were both intended for use with firearms.

That's why I have the power moonroof.

FAIR WARNING: If you're riding with me, shotgun may just mean that ...

[MaggieL]

Originally posted by 99 44/100% pure

Just think, if the evolution of the design of cars as personal armament extensions had continued to the present day, that kid wouldn't have had to squeeze into the trunk to shoot all those folks in Virginia and Maryland!

Even though most of them were in the Maryland victim disarmament zone, it was much safer for him to hide when shooting Virginians.

I sure wouldn't take guidance on firearms history from someone who thinks there's any reason to turret mount a Thompson. There was that SUV with the twin .50s in a thread here a while back, though. :-)

[mitheral]

Originally posted by slang


(The Cliff Clavin side of slang’s personality emerges)

It’s a little known fact that both the automotive glovebox and the automotive “roof” were both intended for use with firearms. The glovebox was originally sized to hold a Colt 1911 as well as a Colt 38 caliber revolver simultaneously. The original roof was designed as a platform for turret mounted Thompson sub guns and the interior had controls to allow the front passenger to control the firing and aiming of the guns. In fact, the Ford motor company had promoted this feature heavily in their brochures.<SNIP>

I'll give you the glove box as I have no knowledge of them, but considering early automobiles were basicly horse carriages with motors attached it seems unlikely machine guns were the reason for roofs. Fully enclosed carriages have existed for hundreds of years (famous example: the Queen's Gold State Coach was built in 1792), well before the introduction of automatic weapons.

[99 44/100% pure]

Originally posted by mitheral
. . . it seems unlikely machine guns were the reason for roofs. Fully enclosed carriages have existed for hundreds of years (famous example: the Queen's Gold State Coach was built in 1792), well before the introduction of automatic weapons.

Um, yer kidding, right? I know slang is a veritable compendium of useful information, but surely you didn't think he was serious when he made his remarks about the design of the automobile? Or that we actually believe it? It's just a joke man; chill out!

[slang]

(slang rubs his chin in deep thought)

I thought the Cliff Clavin reference was enough to indicate that I was joking, aside from the ridiculousness of the actual post.

The general rule is though, that most all of my posts are an attempt (not always successful Mag ) to be funny. I also have a bad habit to trying to steer any topic into firearms promotion or debate.

<H2>AND</h2> I can bearly spell, express complete thoughts/sentences and butcher grammar. But......I'm pretty comfortable with that.

[99 44/100% pure]

Don't worry, slang, I think 99 44/100ths (Hey! That's me!) of the readers got the joke.

But I was not joking about the way New Yorkers park -- I was actually taught to do it that way! Doesn't fly too well out here in Mighty-White-land (the suburb where I currently reside).