Friends of the Opposite Sex

[yesman065]

Having been cheated on (physically) by my "soon-to-be-ex" I believe that the pain caused by the physical is directly related to the mental. It crushed me and all I worked so hard for. I thought that she appreciated me for working multiple jobs so that she could stay home and be with the kids and thats how I was betrayed! Thats the word - betrayal. I think the key here was that she basically betrayed me and when she was the only person that I could count on 100% once thats gone - its VERY difficult to get back.

I never looked at her the same and I strongly feel that is the main reasoon we split up. Even though it took years for it to happen, I tried for a long time to get passed it, but was unable. Maybe I'm not as good a man as I thought. I dunno.

[Madman]

Originally Posted by lumberjim

If you don't hang out with them, they're not your friends, are they? Those are called co-workers. Genetically speaking, if that were true, then yes, you'd be flawed. It is the natural state for us to consider those we encounter. It can be repressed, yes....but that's so ......repressive. Mature behavior begins when you choose to not act on the impulse. Saying you don't want to is either a lie or a defect.

*the above assumes that you find them attractive

Fucking thing timed out on me... Lost my post.

Oh well. Probably a good thing anyway. Since I still feel obgligated to answer this bullshit - I will.

In a nutshell and to the point. What are you talking about? Are you saying co-workers can't be friends? Are you saying that because I don't want to "fuck" my friend that there is something wrong with me? That's pretty "fucked up." Truth is, I may be curious about what they "look like" but that doesn't say anything about wanting to "fuck them." Maybe you would like to "fuck" your neighbor, co-worker or second cousin. If that would be "normal" behavior - Oh, "Genitically Speaking" for you.

Genitically speaking? Oh, that's good! Really good! Please, explain Genetics to us - Genetically Speaking that is. Are you sure the correct term for this is "Genetics?" Try "Human Behavior."

Personally, I don't think you have a scientific clue about what it is you are trying to talk about.

So, don't assume you know someone when you don't that someone at all.

[lumberjim]

Originally Posted by Madman

It appears I am genetically flawed. Personally, I call it "mature behavior." I have several female friends. I don't want to "fuck" them. They don't want to "do the nasty" with me either. Now, we don't "hang out" together, we don't really "party" together. More of a "professional" relationship rather than a "social" relationship. Personally, I don't want to "have sex" with my friends. They're my friends.

Originally Posted by lumberjim

If you don't hang out with them, they're not your friends, are they? Those are called co-workers. Genetically speaking, if that were true, then yes, you'd be flawed. It is the natural state for us to consider those we encounter. It can be repressed, yes....but that's so ......repressive. Mature behavior begins when you choose to not act on the impulse. Saying you don't want to is either a lie or a defect.

*the above assumes that you find them attractive

Originally Posted by Madman

Fucking thing timed out on me... Lost my post.

Oh well. Probably a good thing anyway. Since I still feel obgligated to answer this bullshit - I will.

In a nutshell and to the point. What are you talking about? Are you saying co-workers can't be friends? Are you saying that because I don't want to "fuck" my friend that there is something wrong with me? That's pretty "fucked up." Truth is, I may be curious about what they "look like" but that doesn't say anything about wanting to "fuck them." Maybe you would like to "fuck" your neighbor, co-worker or second cousin. If that would be "normal" behavior - Oh, "Genitically Speaking" for you.

Genitically speaking? Oh, that's good! Really good! Please, explain Genetics to us - Genetically Speaking that is. Are you sure the correct term for this is "Genetics?" Try "Human Behavior."

Personally, I don't think you have a scientific clue about what it is you are trying to talk about.

So, don't assume you know someone when you don't that someone at all.

i hear you saying that you're all pissed of because i dared to contradict you.

you were the one that brought up genetics. i merely agreed that if your statement that you have no desire to fuck your friends was true, then yes, you would be flawed. our genetics include the desire to procreate, or they end when we die. the monogamy we practice is a social construct. i don't pretend to know you. i don't really care to, if you are as stupid and dishonest as you sound, either.

Originally Posted by skysidhe

These posts are confusing but not to worry. I am easily confused.

I think there are many levels of caring and loving. I think there is alot of room in hearts to care. Being monogamous I keep my body just for one and the one that gets my body gets a tighter deeper commitment. It is just the way I am built.

I know that both women and men can be committed or not regardless of if they have friends of the same sex or not.


ps. I just realized that in one of my first posts i mentioned 'old men'. I was refering to an 80 or 90 year old man I find truly repulsive. Luckily he can only walk with a tilting forward kind of shuffle. I mention this because I actually DO like older men but not THAT old.

You just described my walk.

[Madman]

Originally Posted by lumberjim

i hear you saying that you're all pissed of because i dared to contradict you.

you were the one that brought up genetics. i merely agreed that if your statement that you have no desire to fuck your friends was true, then yes, you would be flawed. our genetics include the desire to procreate, or they end when we die. the monogamy we practice is a social construct. i don't pretend to know you. i don't really care to, if you are as stupid and dishonest as you sound, either.

Pissed off? I wasn't pissed. Contradict? Jim, I don't care if you agree or disagree with me. Why? Easy. I don't have to live with you.

I guess if it were me and one, two, three... ten... thirty women in the world then I would probably have a hayday with all my "friends." Since that is not the case. You can fornicate with all the "friends" your desire. Do I want to have any more kids? No. Why? They become teenagers.

This is why I love forums on the Internet. An endless supply of theoretical philosophies to pass from one person to the next. What the hell, if it sounds good - go for it.

Guess I'll go have sex with my neighbors wife. Hmmm, should I ask her first?

Well, back to lurking.

[lumberjim]

sure sounded pissed.

[Madman]

Originally Posted by lumberjim

sure sounded pissed.

I always sound pissed. Just ask my friends.

Note: A new record for me... two posts in one day!