Kids and the Internet - Page 9

Ibby · 04-24-2007, 11:03 PM

Nothing at all - excepting the occasional porn-surf and the cellar - which is exactly why they shouldnt (and don't) snoop. Why should they? It's not their business. I'm safe, I'm responsible, I'm mature, I'm trustworthy. Therefore, my parents act like reasonable people and leave me alone when they dont have to be meddling interfering jerks.

TheMercenary · 04-24-2007, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ibram

It's not their business. I'm safe, I'm responsible, I'm mature, I'm trustworthy. Therefore, my parents act like reasonable people and leave me alone when they dont have to be meddling interfering jerks.

Classic Teen Speak
I love it!!!!

piercehawkeye45 · 04-25-2007, 12:26 AM

You have shown your close-mindedness not only on this, but many other topics. You are unable to look at another view except your own.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merc

You think you are smarter than me, so you know people who are younger who are smarter than you, so you think that because of that the younger people are smarter than me....

You can take what you said two ways but I will break it down for you.

Premise 1- I am smarter than you
Premise 2 - I know minors that are smarter than me.
Conclusion - There are minors that are smarter than you.
Valid argument.

That does not mean every minor is smarter than you, just that there are minors out there that are smarter than you.

You are not pissing me off because you are calling me out, you are pissing me off because you are close-minded (unable to look at any argument brought up by a teen), homophobic (calling Ibram a fag), ignorant racist (use of the term negro), and you look down upon people that are under the age of 20.

TheMercenary · 04-25-2007, 12:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by piercehawkeye45

You have shown your close-mindedness not only on this, but many other topics. You are unable to look at another view except your own.

You can take what you said two ways but I will break it down for you.

Premise 1- I am smarter than you
Premise 2 - I know minors that are smarter than me.
Conclusion - There are minors that are smarter than you.
Valid argument.

That does not mean every minor is smarter than you, just that there are minors out there that are smarter than you.

You are not pissing me off because you are calling me out, you are pissing me off because you are close-minded (unable to look at any argument brought up by a teen), homophobic (calling Ibram a fag), ignorant racist (use of the term negro), and you look down upon people that are under the age of 20.

I am sorry, your argument lack validity. A premise is an "Assumption" aka " a proposition"... that is not a fact. Hence, everthing based on an unfounded premise is actually false. Nice try though...

You can break it down however it suits your needs. I understand your desire to feel as if you are correct in your ASS-YOU-mption. No biggie. You have take a very few exchanges and made huge ASS-YOU-mptions about someone you know nothing about with twice the life experience. A common failing. Please do carry on... this is quite entertaining..

04-25-2007, 02:08 AM

Definitely the right from assault.
They have the best right, the right never to talk to a parent's ass if they speak to them like that after 18.

TheMercenary · 04-25-2007, 09:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rkzenrage

Definitely the right from assault.
They have the best right, the right never to talk to a parent's ass if they speak to them like that after 18.

Absolutely. That has not happened and will not happen to us. I am sure of it.

Cloud · 04-25-2007, 10:25 AM

I can't but be appalled at the turns this discussion has taken.

16 or 45--this behavior is juvenile.

monster · 04-25-2007, 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cloud

I can't but be appalled at the turns this discussion has taken.

16 or 45--this behavior is juvenile.

Agreed. And my answer to the original question is that there is no set age. It's up to their parents/guardians as to whether they should have their own email address and if so, which type to pick (which is best at avoiding adult spam etc). It's up to you to decide whether their parents/guardians are likely to be able to monitor it appropriately before you suggest it.

Probably the younger the better, to be honest -when they are to young to know how to seriously rebel even if they wanted to. Skills learned young are skills for life. Make good behaviour a habit before it occurs to them to rebel and it'll be so much harder for them to hide rebellion from you (although make sure they know why they are doing what they are doing). Teach them how to spot spam and not to open it. Teach them about anonymity -don't open their email account in their name. Use the name of their favorite team or soft toy or book..... And make sure they use a communal computer and know to go to an adult the minute something comes up they don't recognise. Just extend their Safety Town "Stranger Danger" lessons to the internet. rkz is right that it's like real life, but he neglects to compare it to real life outside the home as well as in.

piercehawkeye45 · 04-26-2007, 03:58 PM

I think it is possible to be their parent and best friend but the chances are one in a million and would need compromise from both the kid and the parent which is more than rare.

I did stray away from my parents in high school but I still respected them and they respected me and I am happy how they raised me. I am a very independent person and even though my parents still support me financially, I am confident I can live on my own if I needed to without ever needing them again. But, I still plan to come to them for advice and because of friendship.

TheMercenary · 04-26-2007, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by piercehawkeye45

I think it is possible to be their parent and best friend but the chances are one in a million and would need compromise from both the kid and the parent which is more than rare.

I did stray away from my parents in high school but I still respected them and they respected me and I am happy how they raised me. I am a very independent person and even though my parents still support me financially, I am confident I can live on my own if I needed to without ever needing them again. But, I still plan to come to them for advice and because of friendship.

Glad to hear it worked out. There are so many possibilities. So many pitfalls. Even the ones who pull away eventually come back around after they become adults.

Aliantha · 04-27-2007, 01:17 AM

Well for one thing, I don't think my relationship with my children will ever be the same as it is with their peer group. It definitely isn't now, so why would it be at any other age?

Peer groups and parents give people different things. If a child is raised well, there's no reason for one relationship to suffer because of the other. There is room for both to co-exist and in some cases, to nourish each other. At the moment, this is what we have in our household. I plan on doing everything possible to make sure it stays that way.

I expect them to become independant, and I see them letting go of their dependance on me more and more every day. It doesn't make me sad. It makes me proud that I've raised children who're showing that they can be responsible and trustworthy even though they're still young. Why should I not expect things to continue in the same way? Why should I expect my kids to all of a sudden become secretive and deceptive? As a parent, it's my responsibility to make sure they feel safe and accepted enough to know that they can be honest with me and not be judged for it.

My mother was my best friend.

TheMercenary · 04-27-2007, 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aliantha

Why should I not expect things to continue in the same way? Why should I expect my kids to all of a sudden become secretive and deceptive? .

Great, come back in about 8 years and let us all know how it turned out.

Quote:

My mother was my best friend.

Great, glad it worked out for you. That is not the norm. You cannot be your childs best friend and be an effective parent. I stand by that statement.

Aliantha · 04-27-2007, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheMercenary

Great, come back in about 8 years and let us all know how it turned out.
Great, glad it worked out for you. That is not the norm. You cannot be your childs best friend and be an effective parent. I stand by that statement.

If I'm still posting here in 8yrs time I'll be surprised.

I never said it was the norm for parents to be their childrens best friend. I only said mine was. Are you suggesting my mother was not an effective parent?

TheMercenary · 04-28-2007, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aliantha

Are you suggesting my mother was not an effective parent?

Not at all.

I am saying that parents who try to be their kids best friends are less effective as parents [b]IMHO[/].

Stormieweather · 04-28-2007, 10:18 AM

I have kids ranging in age from 24 yrs old to 22 months. I've found that they will live up to or down to the level of your expectations of them. Give them trust and expect them to live up to it and they almost always will. Expect them to be rotten, lying monsters and that's pretty much what you'll get.

In my house, we don't call anyone derrogatory names. Fag, nigger, bitch, asshole, jerk, butthead or pig (yeah Alec, even pig) are not heard from my family. I've taught my kids that in order to receive respect, they must also offer it. Might does NOT make right. And insults are usually attempts to prop up a weak or nonexistant arguement.

Stormie

04-24-2007, 11:03 PM	#1
Ibby erika Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: "the high up north" Posts: 6,127	Nothing at all - excepting the occasional porn-surf and the cellar - which is exactly why they shouldnt (and don't) snoop. Why should they? It's not their business. I'm safe, I'm responsible, I'm mature, I'm trustworthy. Therefore, my parents act like reasonable people and leave me alone when they dont have to be meddling interfering jerks. __________________ not really back, you didn't see me, i was never here shhhhhh

04-25-2007, 10:25 AM	#7
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	I can't but be appalled at the turns this discussion has taken. 16 or 45--this behavior is juvenile. __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"

04-27-2007, 01:17 AM	#11
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Well for one thing, I don't think my relationship with my children will ever be the same as it is with their peer group. It definitely isn't now, so why would it be at any other age? Peer groups and parents give people different things. If a child is raised well, there's no reason for one relationship to suffer because of the other. There is room for both to co-exist and in some cases, to nourish each other. At the moment, this is what we have in our household. I plan on doing everything possible to make sure it stays that way. I expect them to become independant, and I see them letting go of their dependance on me more and more every day. It doesn't make me sad. It makes me proud that I've raised children who're showing that they can be responsible and trustworthy even though they're still young. Why should I not expect things to continue in the same way? Why should I expect my kids to all of a sudden become secretive and deceptive? As a parent, it's my responsibility to make sure they feel safe and accepted enough to know that they can be honest with me and not be judged for it. My mother was my best friend. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

04-28-2007, 10:18 AM	#15
Stormieweather Wearing her bitch boots Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Floriduh Posts: 1,181	I have kids ranging in age from 24 yrs old to 22 months. I've found that they will live up to or down to the level of your expectations of them. Give them trust and expect them to live up to it and they almost always will. Expect them to be rotten, lying monsters and that's pretty much what you'll get. In my house, we don't call anyone derrogatory names. Fag, nigger, bitch, asshole, jerk, butthead or pig (yeah Alec, even pig) are not heard from my family. I've taught my kids that in order to receive respect, they must also offer it. Might does NOT make right. And insults are usually attempts to prop up a weak or nonexistant arguement. Stormie __________________ "First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." - Mahatma Gandhi

04-25-2007, 02:08 AM	#5
rkzenrage Guest Posts: n/a	Definitely the right from assault. They have the best right, the right never to talk to a parent's ass if they speak to them like that after 18.

04-26-2007, 03:58 PM	#9
piercehawkeye45 Franklin Pierce Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Minnesota Posts: 3,695	I think it is possible to be their parent and best friend but the chances are one in a million and would need compromise from both the kid and the parent which is more than rare. I did stray away from my parents in high school but I still respected them and they respected me and I am happy how they raised me. I am a very independent person and even though my parents still support me financially, I am confident I can live on my own if I needed to without ever needing them again. But, I still plan to come to them for advice and because of friendship.

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