|
Relationships People who need people; or, why can't we all just get along? |
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
02-02-2007, 01:21 AM | #1 | |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
Reprinted advice
A kid asked me for some advice when he found out how long my wife and I had been together, on another board. This was my reply.
It is worded strange because I wrote it pretty far into the thread after he asked and repeated a lot of the earlier discussion within my reply so others would understand what was going on when they read it... if that makes any sense. Discuss? Quote:
|
|
02-02-2007, 03:11 AM | #2 |
Encroaching on your decrees
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland
Posts: 7,016
|
Hard to discuss it because you've said it all right there, rk. Excellent advice!
__________________
Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of |
02-02-2007, 03:21 AM | #3 |
Professor
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,555
|
Thanks for posting that. Since my girlfriend just said she didn't know if she loved me anymore, I wish I could have read this about 3 hours earlier.
|
02-02-2007, 10:05 AM | #4 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
Perhaps it is not too late my friend... or perhaps you are going to do better later on. I hope for the best for you.
|
02-02-2007, 02:19 PM | #5 | |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
A continuation of the conversation... this young person is having a hard time. Part of my posting this here is to double-check that I am not messing-up somehow. I want to know if you see anything that may need amending.
Quote:
|
|
02-02-2007, 02:21 PM | #6 | ||
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
|
Quote:
Quote:
|
||
02-02-2007, 02:38 PM | #7 |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
|
Perhaps you should only give advice about whatever it is that you are supposed to be an expert on.
|
02-02-2007, 02:41 PM | #8 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
Sure would reduce your posts... I will if you will... would be worth it.
I'm sure a Dr. would tell someone who is depressed & needed meds that they would gain NO help with the meds from talking with someone... yeah-right. |
02-02-2007, 03:01 PM | #9 |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
|
If you catch me giving out advice about what I don't know about, point it out in the thread where I do it, like I'm doin' for you here. Otherwise, it ain't half useful.
Each person's situation is different. Some will benefit from nothing but talk therapy. Some will benefit best from a combination of meds and talk therapy. And others, such as myself, can be diagnosed (a key word here) with a chronic (another key word) condition which can be helped by medication and not so much, if at all, through talk or other coping methods. One reason I know this is because I tried talk and other coping methods for 20 years, and continued to suffer and suffer; medication solved it in two months and continues to solve it perfectly with no side effects and no HIGHLY expensive talk therapy. And the reason I am a stickler about this is because it might help another person stop suffering sooner than 20 years. |
02-02-2007, 03:08 PM | #10 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
As I stated in the first post, and I too have been through the system for over twenty years, I disagree with you, and am going to.
I don't believe in a magic mind pill. I, have never stated, specifically, talk therapy. You filled that in on your own. |
02-02-2007, 03:29 PM | #11 |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
|
You asked what a doctor would say; I have posted what a doctor would say. Is that part of the equation for you or do you get to ignore it?
Simply by using the term "magic mind pill" your bias from willful ignorance is on display. Your spread of such ignorance will cause people to suffer needlessly. Please, don't. |
02-02-2007, 05:51 PM | #12 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
I asked?
No thanks for the ThreadJack, especially after I asked you not to. You sure have a lot in common with TW. |
02-02-2007, 06:02 PM | #13 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
|
Why ask if you don't want to hear it?
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
02-02-2007, 06:47 PM | #14 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
I made one specific request, about a point that was discussed to death earlier, nothing else.
But, you already know this. |
02-02-2007, 09:19 PM | #15 |
Wearing her bitch boots
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Floriduh
Posts: 1,181
|
I recently had the opportunity to view a marvelous motivational video - What's right with the world
One of the main premises of the video is that what we believe affects our perceptions which become our reality. I believe that we are in control of our own happiness (or lack thereof). That doesn't mean that other influences don't cause us pain or that we don't have problems which may seem insurmountable, it simply means we control how we react to them and we choose how to view them, as well as ourselves. I think we have 'internal tapes' that we play which affect our self-esteem, our ego, our confidence and our outlook on life. These tapes are a result of our life experiences and teachings. Internal scripts that follow the lines of...I'm miserable, my life sucks, my husband/wife is the pits, I'm fat/ugly/short/weird/stupid and nobody likes me generally become self-fulfilling. Every time we tell ourselves that (or believe it when someone else says it), it is closer to becoming our reality. I'm NOT a doctor, but from I've studied, I've come to think that in some cases, there IS a chemical imbalance which can be helped through medication(s). My understanding is that this type of chemical imbalance has physical effects such as lethargia, listlessness, lack of enthusiasm, sleep issues and a disruption of cognitive reasoning. But this does not change the fact that we are all responsible for ourselves and our belief patterns/perceptions. I wrote an essay 20 years ago in which I described each person's life as a ship. We, as the captain, steer our ship with our choices. Just as a captain can't control the tides, the waves, winds or ice floes, we don't have control over the outside influences which affect our lives, such as illness, job loss, abuse, or traffic jams on the way home. We DO however, have control over how we choose to react to them. We can make a concious choice to have a positive outlook and to find the best in our world (instead of focusing on what's wrong). As Rkzenrage says, it doesn't happen overnight. It took 20, 30, 40 years to learn those negative scripts and it will take a lot of effort and time to rewrite them. The habits of a lifetime are hard to break, but it can be done. Everytime I find myself blaming someone/something else for my own unhappiness, I shut off the tape and revise my response. I believe that with all problems that come my way, I can choose to accept the situation, change the situation or change my perception of the situation. This then, becomes my reality. So, I think I'm thin. I'm really, really slender. That roll of fat around my waist? Is. not. there. . Stormie
__________________
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." - Mahatma Gandhi |
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests) | |
|
|