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Old 02-01-2013, 11:44 AM   #1
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street
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What's just, I don't know, you today?

This is a pretty funny essay on the perils of being single in Vermont.

http://www.vermonter.com/singles-dating-vt.asp
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Old 02-27-2013, 02:26 PM   #2
infinite monkey
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I'll tell you what's just, I don't know, today.

I was in two meetings (4 1/2 hours GAWD) and they make me grumpy.

But anyway, the word on the street is that why we were safely in another building they arrested some dude running around with a gun. Apparently there was some skirmish with the food service court across the hall.

That's nice. I don't like my pretzel. BANG.

No notice to us (in accordance with the Clery Act of 1990)
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Old 02-27-2013, 03:58 PM   #3
infinite monkey
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Rumors are never right.

The gun dude WAS chased through our hallway. I guess he was trying to get away as he was outside robbing people.

As Chris Rock said: go take care of your kids so they ain't tryin' to rob me in five years.

Seriously.
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Old 02-27-2013, 03:59 PM   #4
orthodoc
Not Suspicious, Merely Canadian
 
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That essay is terrifying ...

Sounds just like western Pennsylvania.
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Old 02-27-2013, 04:04 PM   #5
Trilby
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a gift, utterly unasked for.

Even the sun can't manage such skirts.

If my mouth could marry a hurt like that.

etc.
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Old 03-01-2013, 02:29 PM   #6
Sundae
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Location: West Yorkshire
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e e cummings?

I may be wrong.
But you have to come back to tell me so.
ANSWER YOUR BLOODY PHONE, WOMAN!

Miss you.
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Old 03-01-2013, 02:37 PM   #7
Sundae
polaroid of perfection
 
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Location: West Yorkshire
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Time is what I thought I had;
A shared life is what I want.

Breakfast in bed
Is less important than humour.

Money is far less important
Than shared intelligence.

I want to love you for your mind
First.
We can work on the wallet together
Later.

I have trust issues.
Sorry.
But you love me.

Love me.
We'll work it out.
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Old 03-11-2013, 03:57 PM   #8
infinite monkey
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I don't know. Sad, tired, beaten.

I still have a job, but I am on corrective action. I think it will all work out though. I'm doing the best I can.

I think I need a good night's sleep.
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Old 03-11-2013, 04:44 PM   #9
glatt
 
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Location: Arlington, VA
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They always suggest a nice toasty bath to unwind. But I always thought suggesting a bath was kind of offensive.
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Old 03-11-2013, 05:24 PM   #10
infinite monkey
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Today you're not far off. I overslept this morning. Took a whore bath. ;
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Old 03-16-2013, 10:53 AM   #11
Gravdigr
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Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 37,563
What's just, I don't know, me today?

I had 1,070 items in my 'puter's recycle bin.

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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
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Old 03-16-2013, 10:55 AM   #12
Gravdigr
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Quote:
Originally Posted by infinite monkey View Post
...I am on corrective action...
Quote:
Originally Posted by infinite monkey View Post
Took a whore bath.
You sound like one o' them bad girls my mama told me about.

I like them.

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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
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Old 03-16-2013, 11:01 AM   #13
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street
Posts: 18,130
Quote:
Originally Posted by infinite monkey
...I am on corrective action...

Originally Posted by infinite monkey
Took a whore bath.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post
You sound like one o' them bad girls my mama told me about.

I like them.

Quote:
Originally Posted by henry quirk
How can I not love her?
You'll have to do better than that, Grav.
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Old 03-16-2013, 12:35 PM   #14
Griff
still says videotape
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
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Turns out planer blades are sharp.
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Old 03-16-2013, 12:39 PM   #15
Undertoad
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post
I had 1,070 items in my 'puter's recycle bin.
Imagine how much you helped the environment today!
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