Potential sub looking for guidance

[morethanpretty]

Originally Posted by Rrrraven

I think that suggesting someone might need counseling to explore why they identify as a sub is like telling someone they're not okay for something as basic as sexual orientation. Different is not deviant.

I also think that there tends to be some misinformation outside of the D/s world as to who actually has the *power* in a D/s relationship. Most subs I know are extremely dominant in their professional lives/family lives and choose to submit in their sexual lives. One could argue that the sub has all the power, or even better that a D/s relationship is all about power exchange. Negotiation is optimal in D/s relationships, if you can't negotiate your relationship, your limits, then there is no D/s relationship.

Just my .02

Sexual orientation and lifestyle are not synonymous. Your life should not revolve around another person, or be in the control of someone else. This poster is talking about having a dom tell her what to do on a day to day basis.

where I can surrender control to a dominant on some daily activites (e.g. clothes I wear, food I eat etc.).

Basic vocabulary lesson: different and deviant are synonyms. Just FYI.