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Relationships People who need people; or, why can't we all just get along? |
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#1 |
Doctor Wtf
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Badelaide, Baustralia
Posts: 12,861
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Well, there is the woodchuck solution ... applied to the MIL, I emphasise!
Seriously, what Clod said. Related: Australian soldiers in Vietnam were stagering back to base from R&R so pissed and hung-over that they were useless the next day. A rule had to be brought in that their last (I think) 24 hours of R&R were on base and dry. Gave them time to sober up before more soldiering. So if it is viable, maybe a few hours getting massaged, soaked, aromatherapised, etc might improve Homegirl. If not, have the massage yourself. She'll still be the same, only you won't mind so much.
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Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl. |
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#2 |
Professor
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 1,622
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All of the advice above sounds good-implementable? Is the considering divorce bit only because of how she is when she gets back from her mum's or are there other contributing factors?
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#3 |
Slattern of the Swail
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
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oh, my. I'm sorry to hear it.
I like you, footy. I think you're swell. Take some time and think and breathe and de-compress. Divorce isn't the heaven some people think it is....get some time and space.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
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#4 | |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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Quote:
oh wait, that's millionaires I'm thinking of. nevermind
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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#5 | |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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*grins*
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#6 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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![]() Kumbaya, my Lord...
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![]() These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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#7 |
King Of Wishful Thinking
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Philadelphia Suburbs
Posts: 6,669
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Sorry to hear about it.
Take your time with it. Get a babysitter and take an overnight trip to reconnect and talk it out away from the kids. Even that small piece of generic advice is presumptuous of me. There is so much I don't know. Still, alone time and communication are almost never a bad idea. Good luck with everything.
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Exercise your rights and remember your obligations - VOTE!I have always believed that hope is that stubborn thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us so long as we have the courage to keep reaching, to keep working, to keep fighting. -- Barack Hussein Obama |
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#8 |
still says videotape
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
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If I'm really tired and scanning, I sometimes miss the point.
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If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis |
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#9 |
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
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Take a deep breath. . . then a few more. There is so much to think about before going there. Bri has it right - it is not the heaven some think it is. It creates a whole new host of problems - just a couple -2 households, double all bills -split time with/without kids, parenting...
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"like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt |
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#10 |
a beautiful fool
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: 39.939705
Posts: 4,504
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aw fuck, bro.
I should have a bunch of advice for you, but I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing or why anymore. Would not go back if given the chance at this point, but if I could go back in time and fix it before the damage was irreparable, I'd do that foshizzle. Whatever you decide to do, and if you want to, count on me when you need to talk to someone. I'll email my cell #, call me anytime.
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There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool |
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#11 | |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
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Quote:
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#12 |
~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,828
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![]() That's all I know. |
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#13 |
Makes some feel uncomfortable
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 10,346
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I wonder if she does something at her mother's which she is ashamed of. Causing an argument with you may justify her behavior at her mother's. Or perhaps she is upset that you all get along well without her. Just thinking.
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#14 |
Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
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I don't know what to say, brother.
There is real pain in your voice and that hurts me to hear it. Not like your shoulder which was painful but had a "solution". Part of me wants (urgently) to *fix* this for you and yours. Ha... I know I can't fix it. Furthermore, you know how to "fix" it, if it is "fixable" at all. Buddy, you've put me in a difficult position here! So, I'll listen instead. That I can do and do well. Talk on, and if you accidentally say a question I *can* answer, my inner fixer will leap at the opportunity. He knows a lot about this stuff. For now, he's safely gagged. Please, continue.
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Be Just and Fear Not. |
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#15 |
™
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 27,717
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I'm sorry foot. You are a good guy, and don't deserve this. I don't have any advice for you. I just hope it all works out and you can avoid the divorce. I've seen people manage divorce well, and come out the other side much better off and happier. I've also seen people really get destroyed by it. The financial side of divorce can be absolutely devastating for everyone involved, especially when kids are involved. I'm not saying you should stay in a bad marriage to save a buck, but you should try everything to save it before you cross that bridge.
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