About at my journey's end - Page 2

ZenGum · 05-23-2011, 01:02 AM

Well, there is the woodchuck solution ... applied to the MIL, I emphasise!

Seriously, what Clod said. Related: Australian soldiers in Vietnam were stagering back to base from R&R so pissed and hung-over that they were useless the next day. A rule had to be brought in that their last (I think) 24 hours of R&R were on base and dry. Gave them time to sober up before more soldiering.

So if it is viable, maybe a few hours getting massaged, soaked, aromatherapised, etc might improve Homegirl.

If not, have the massage yourself. She'll still be the same, only you won't mind so much.

casimendocina · 05-23-2011, 03:52 AM

All of the advice above sounds good-implementable? Is the considering divorce bit only because of how she is when she gets back from her mum's or are there other contributing factors?

Trilby · 05-23-2011, 07:47 AM

oh, my. I'm sorry to hear it.

I like you, footy. I think you're swell. Take some time and think and breathe and de-compress. Divorce isn't the heaven some people think it is....get some time and space.

xoxoxoBruce · 06-01-2011, 02:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna

Divorce isn't the heaven some people think it is....get some time and space.

That's for women. For divorced men it's great... the best booze, drugs, cars, and lots of hos...
oh wait, that's millionaires I'm thinking of. nevermind

DanaC · 06-01-2011, 03:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

That's for women. For divorced men it's great... the best booze, drugs, cars, and lots of hobos...
oh wait, that's Shawnees I'm thinking of. nevermind

*grins*

Gravdigr · 06-01-2011, 02:54 PM

Kumbaya, my Lord...

richlevy · 06-04-2011, 05:23 AM

Sorry to hear about it.

Take your time with it. Get a babysitter and take an overnight trip to reconnect and talk it out away from the kids.

Even that small piece of generic advice is presumptuous of me. There is so much I don't know. Still, alone time and communication are almost never a bad idea.

Good luck with everything.

Griff · 06-04-2011, 07:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by richlevy

Take ... a babysitter and take an overnight trip...

If I'm really tired and scanning, I sometimes miss the point.

classicman · 05-23-2011, 08:42 AM

Take a deep breath. . . then a few more. There is so much to think about before going there. Bri has it right - it is not the heaven some think it is. It creates a whole new host of problems - just a couple -2 households, double all bills -split time with/without kids, parenting...

jimhelm · 05-23-2011, 09:06 AM

aw fuck, bro.

I should have a bunch of advice for you, but I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing or why anymore. Would not go back if given the chance at this point, but if I could go back in time and fix it before the damage was irreparable, I'd do that foshizzle. Whatever you decide to do, and if you want to, count on me when you need to talk to someone. I'll email my cell #, call me anytime.

Undertoad · 05-23-2011, 12:05 PM

Quote:

I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing or why anymore

Good times is what! You have teh skillz to find somebody who actually likes you and stuff. Your time is now if it isn't already. So it will be with footer, after a time.

skysidhe · 05-23-2011, 12:28 PM

for the pains.

That's all I know.

Spexxvet · 05-23-2011, 12:37 PM

I wonder if she does something at her mother's which she is ashamed of. Causing an argument with you may justify her behavior at her mother's. Or perhaps she is upset that you all get along well without her. Just thinking.

BigV · 05-23-2011, 01:49 PM

I don't know what to say, brother.

There is real pain in your voice and that hurts me to hear it. Not like your shoulder which was painful but had a "solution". Part of me wants (urgently) to *fix* this for you and yours. Ha... I know I can't fix it. Furthermore, you know how to "fix" it, if it is "fixable" at all. Buddy, you've put me in a difficult position here!

So, I'll listen instead. That I can do and do well. Talk on, and if you accidentally say a question I *can* answer, my inner fixer will leap at the opportunity. He knows a lot about this stuff. For now, he's safely gagged. Please, continue.

glatt · 05-23-2011, 02:24 PM

I'm sorry foot. You are a good guy, and don't deserve this. I don't have any advice for you. I just hope it all works out and you can avoid the divorce. I've seen people manage divorce well, and come out the other side much better off and happier. I've also seen people really get destroyed by it. The financial side of divorce can be absolutely devastating for everyone involved, especially when kids are involved. I'm not saying you should stay in a bad marriage to save a buck, but you should try everything to save it before you cross that bridge.

05-23-2011, 01:02 AM	#1
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	Well, there is the woodchuck solution ... applied to the MIL, I emphasise! Seriously, what Clod said. Related: Australian soldiers in Vietnam were stagering back to base from R&R so pissed and hung-over that they were useless the next day. A rule had to be brought in that their last (I think) 24 hours of R&R were on base and dry. Gave them time to sober up before more soldiering. So if it is viable, maybe a few hours getting massaged, soaked, aromatherapised, etc might improve Homegirl. If not, have the massage yourself. She'll still be the same, only you won't mind so much. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

05-23-2011, 07:47 AM	#3
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	oh, my. I'm sorry to hear it. I like you, footy. I think you're swell. Take some time and think and breathe and de-compress. Divorce isn't the heaven some people think it is....get some time and space. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

06-01-2011, 02:54 PM	#6
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Kumbaya, my Lord... __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

06-04-2011, 05:23 AM	#7
richlevy King Of Wishful Thinking Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Philadelphia Suburbs Posts: 6,669	Sorry to hear about it. Take your time with it. Get a babysitter and take an overnight trip to reconnect and talk it out away from the kids. Even that small piece of generic advice is presumptuous of me. There is so much I don't know. Still, alone time and communication are almost never a bad idea. Good luck with everything. __________________ Exercise your rights and remember your obligations - VOTE! I have always believed that hope is that stubborn thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us so long as we have the courage to keep reaching, to keep working, to keep fighting. -- Barack Hussein Obama

05-23-2011, 08:42 AM	#9
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	Take a deep breath. . . then a few more. There is so much to think about before going there. Bri has it right - it is not the heaven some think it is. It creates a whole new host of problems - just a couple -2 households, double all bills -split time with/without kids, parenting... __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

05-23-2011, 03:52 AM	#2
casimendocina Professor Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 1,622	All of the advice above sounds good-implementable? Is the considering divorce bit only because of how she is when she gets back from her mum's or are there other contributing factors?

05-23-2011, 09:06 AM	#10
jimhelm a beautiful fool Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: 39.939705 Posts: 4,504	aw fuck, bro. I should have a bunch of advice for you, but I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing or why anymore. Would not go back if given the chance at this point, but if I could go back in time and fix it before the damage was irreparable, I'd do that foshizzle. Whatever you decide to do, and if you want to, count on me when you need to talk to someone. I'll email my cell #, call me anytime. __________________ There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool

05-23-2011, 12:28 PM	#12
skysidhe ~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~ Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 6,828	for the pains. That's all I know.

05-23-2011, 12:37 PM	#13
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	I wonder if she does something at her mother's which she is ashamed of. Causing an argument with you may justify her behavior at her mother's. Or perhaps she is upset that you all get along well without her. Just thinking. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

05-23-2011, 01:49 PM	#14
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	I don't know what to say, brother. There is real pain in your voice and that hurts me to hear it. Not like your shoulder which was painful but had a "solution". Part of me wants (urgently) to fix this for you and yours. Ha... I know I can't fix it. Furthermore, you know how to "fix" it, if it is "fixable" at all. Buddy, you've put me in a difficult position here! So, I'll listen instead. That I can do and do well. Talk on, and if you accidentally say a question I can answer, my inner fixer will leap at the opportunity. He knows a lot about this stuff. For now, he's safely gagged. Please, continue. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

05-23-2011, 02:24 PM	#15
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	I'm sorry foot. You are a good guy, and don't deserve this. I don't have any advice for you. I just hope it all works out and you can avoid the divorce. I've seen people manage divorce well, and come out the other side much better off and happier. I've also seen people really get destroyed by it. The financial side of divorce can be absolutely devastating for everyone involved, especially when kids are involved. I'm not saying you should stay in a bad marriage to save a buck, but you should try everything to save it before you cross that bridge.

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