The Cellar  

Go Back   The Cellar > Main > Home Base

Home Base A starting point, and place for threads don't seem to belong anywhere else

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-11-2020, 04:29 PM   #5896
Clodfobble
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
That happened at the house across the street from ours, about 15-ish years ago. Dude was having a mental health crisis and threatening suicide (which apparently was common for him), wife was out and called the cops to check on him. A beat officer knocked on the door and a single shot was fired.

12 hours, 1 SWAT team, and an evacuated street later, they finally stormed the house to find that the one shot had been the guy committing suicide. He hadn't even known it was a cop at the door.
Clodfobble is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2020, 02:13 PM   #5897
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
A young American man moves to the Shetland Isles. Unbeknownst to him, the Shetland peoples are quite reserved, and no-one visits him for three months.

One stormy night, there's a loud knock at the door. He opens the door to the sight of a huge, fiery-haired man with a thick beard. With an accent equally as thick, the visitor says, "I've come to invite ye to a party."

"Wonderful," says the American, "I'd love to go!"

"I must warn ye, lad. The drinks will be flowin' aplenty."

"That's no problem, I've been known to enjoy a strong scotch now and again," replies the American.

"They'll likely be a fight too," says the bearded man. "Where there's drinkin' and dancin' there's always a fight."

"I'm not worried, I was middleweight champion in boxing back in the navy. I'm sure I can hold my own."

"Alright, lad. But one last thing. There's likely to be sex involved too. Hairy-arsed, drunken sex."

The American smirks. "Well, after being alone for so many months, that's not out of the question either. One question though: what should I wear?"

The big man chuckles and replies, "Ah, come as you are, it's just gonna be you and me."
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2020, 02:41 PM   #5898
Gravdigr
The Un-Tuckian
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
Apologies if this is a repeat:

Name:  u2gps.JPG
Views: 539
Size:  61.0 KB
__________________


These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
Gravdigr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-23-2020, 01:07 AM   #5899
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
I remember some of these statement. Hell, I probably made some of them.
Attached Images
 
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-19-2020, 12:22 AM   #5900
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
At least it's red...
Attached Images
 
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2020, 12:24 AM   #5901
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
Fake news...
Attached Images
 
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2020, 08:03 AM   #5902
Gravdigr
The Un-Tuckian
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
So long EMeekins98, we hardly knew ye...
__________________


These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
Gravdigr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2020, 08:54 AM   #5903
Carruthers
Junior Master Dwellar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Buckinghamshire UK
Posts: 4,059
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post
So long EMeekins98, we hardly knew ye...
That's such a shame. Just when I was developing an interest in Polish electrical vehicles as well.
__________________
Carruthers is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2020, 11:21 AM   #5904
Griff
still says videotape
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
His life was short and beautiful.
__________________
If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you.
- Louis D. Brandeis
Griff is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2020, 12:31 PM   #5905
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
For polish electrical vehicles life is short, fire, ash.
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-2020, 11:25 AM   #5906
Gravdigr
The Un-Tuckian
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
Name:  gtfo.JPG
Views: 438
Size:  69.5 KB
__________________


These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.
Gravdigr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-2020, 02:43 PM   #5907
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post


Spoiler:

they're legumes
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2020, 12:53 AM   #5908
Urbane Guerrilla
Person who doesn't update the user title
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Southern California
Posts: 6,674
Quote:
Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce View Post
Fake news...
Hey, I want the coffee-cup version.
__________________
Wanna stop school shootings? End Gun-Free Zones, of course.
Urbane Guerrilla is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2020, 09:34 PM   #5909
xoxoxoBruce
The future is unwritten
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
In Europe you can have a whirlwind courtship in a long day...
Attached Images
 
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.
xoxoxoBruce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-11-2020, 02:47 PM   #5910
Griff
still says videotape
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
Why drive to Germany when you're already in Austria?
__________________
If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you.
- Louis D. Brandeis
Griff is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
humor


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 2 (0 members and 2 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:32 PM.


Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.