Day Early, Dollar Extra: October Investigations (Noobs, jump in)

[Gravdigr]

Choose your weapon. Penguins or Ostriches? Ostriches, duh...

You are the hero of the story, you have just broken into the office of the baddie in their castle at the top of a mountain*, messed up their computer and entire empire, you have the chip you need to save the world if you can get it back to base… ….how do you escape?
*Surrounding terrain of your choosing Hang-glider.

Fill in the blank: As happy as a ____________________ pig in shit., or, alternatively, a puppy with two peters.

Ice cream or pie? I guess not, cuz diebeetus.

Would you try walking over hot coals if given the opportunity? Uh, no.

Is this weird yet? A little, but they usually are.

Supplies are short, rationing is in effect. You just entered the convenience store/corner shop when all hell breaks loose and looters crash in. What do you grab? Closest to you are bread, toilet paper, cheese, bleach and canned mushrooms. What do you do? Grab the toilet paper and mushrooms, the only things near me I can use, cuz diebeetus. And then run like hell.

Do you like to have your hair washed by somebody else? Not necessarily But, if it's a female and she is properly scantily clad, maybe.

Am I forgiven? I don't know. But I know that you can be.

What is the furthest place (physical distance-wise) you have ever been from where you were born? Probably Idaho. Or Arizona. Either way, less than 2000 miles.

What is the best pill ever invented? THE pill.

When did you last buy gas/petrol? Sept. 29.