A Yuletide Tragedy

Elspode · 12-20-2004, 11:41 PM

I arrived at the hospital at around 4:30 this afternoon. At about 4:45, the doctors called in the mother, my wife and another friend (as clergy), and the mother's housemate. They reported that CAT and MRI scans confirm no function in the midbrain. They have advised discontinuation of life support as soon as possible in order to make the child's passing as easy as possible.

Since it is likely that Connor will continue to breathe for some time after the ventilator is removed, this is not going to be like simply turning off a switch. "Unplugging" someone is not the clean, neat process that we all would wish for it to be. Instead, the patient's body systems take time to fail, and the process of physical death can take hours, even days.

The mother has asked for numerous family, community members and clergy to be present when Connor's support is discontinued. There will be nearly twenty people in the ICU, and a ritual will be conducted. There will probably be nearly twenty more in the waiting room, as a vigil begins to ensure that someone is with both Connor and his mother at the critical moment.

Such a woeful event. I can only say that we are truly blessed to have such a closely knit community.

Elspode · 12-20-2004, 11:46 PM

I keep forgetting to add (and I'm sure that at some point you people are going to think that I'm making all this up, but it is all too sadly true) that my wife's maternal Aunt Judy passed over on Saturday night, and so we will be driving down to South Central Missouri on Thursday morning for a funeral service, then turning around and driving back up to Belton (the town on the immediate Southern border of Grandview, where I live) for internment. I am to be a pallbearer.

While my wife talked from the waiting room to her mother, making our plans for the Thursday event, her mother informed her that her 90 year old paternal Aunt Cora was displaying severe symptoms of congestive heart failure, and might be on her last legs as well. She, too, lives down at the lake near the rest of my wife's core of family.

It is not beyond the realm of possibility that we will be attending, participating in or otherwise facilitating three funerals within a week's time, all during the holidays.

You can't make this stuff up, people. You'd be a sick fuck if you did.

dar512 · 12-21-2004, 08:23 AM

I am not a superstitious man, but I have to say, Els, that I would never, ever stand next to you in a thunderstorm.

On the other hand, you are seriously due for some better days.

Peace be with you.

Elspode · 12-21-2004, 08:31 AM

I don't know that my lot is any worse than anyone else's. I just have to write about it to keep from going insane, and you Cellarites are the unfortunate audience for these outbursts.

I'm not really a depressing person. It is just that I have discovered that the only way to vent and assuage my internal grief is to externalize it in writing.

Just the same, I would keep my distance during inclement weather if I were you. :p

12-20-2004, 11:41 PM	#1
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	I arrived at the hospital at around 4:30 this afternoon. At about 4:45, the doctors called in the mother, my wife and another friend (as clergy), and the mother's housemate. They reported that CAT and MRI scans confirm no function in the midbrain. They have advised discontinuation of life support as soon as possible in order to make the child's passing as easy as possible. Since it is likely that Connor will continue to breathe for some time after the ventilator is removed, this is not going to be like simply turning off a switch. "Unplugging" someone is not the clean, neat process that we all would wish for it to be. Instead, the patient's body systems take time to fail, and the process of physical death can take hours, even days. The mother has asked for numerous family, community members and clergy to be present when Connor's support is discontinued. There will be nearly twenty people in the ICU, and a ritual will be conducted. There will probably be nearly twenty more in the waiting room, as a vigil begins to ensure that someone is with both Connor and his mother at the critical moment. Such a woeful event. I can only say that we are truly blessed to have such a closely knit community. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

12-20-2004, 11:46 PM	#2
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	I keep forgetting to add (and I'm sure that at some point you people are going to think that I'm making all this up, but it is all too sadly true) that my wife's maternal Aunt Judy passed over on Saturday night, and so we will be driving down to South Central Missouri on Thursday morning for a funeral service, then turning around and driving back up to Belton (the town on the immediate Southern border of Grandview, where I live) for internment. I am to be a pallbearer. While my wife talked from the waiting room to her mother, making our plans for the Thursday event, her mother informed her that her 90 year old paternal Aunt Cora was displaying severe symptoms of congestive heart failure, and might be on her last legs as well. She, too, lives down at the lake near the rest of my wife's core of family. It is not beyond the realm of possibility that we will be attending, participating in or otherwise facilitating three funerals within a week's time, all during the holidays. You can't make this stuff up, people. You'd be a sick fuck if you did. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

12-21-2004, 08:31 AM	#4
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	I don't know that my lot is any worse than anyone else's. I just have to write about it to keep from going insane, and you Cellarites are the unfortunate audience for these outbursts. I'm not really a depressing person. It is just that I have discovered that the only way to vent and assuage my internal grief is to externalize it in writing. Just the same, I would keep my distance during inclement weather if I were you. :p __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

12-21-2004, 08:23 AM	#3
dar512 dar512 is now Pete Zicato Join Date: May 2003 Location: Chicago suburb Posts: 4,968	I am not a superstitious man, but I have to say, Els, that I would never, ever stand next to you in a thunderstorm. On the other hand, you are seriously due for some better days. Peace be with you.

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