Anxious

[Hoof Hearted]

Originally Posted by freshnesschronic

The only reason why I allowed this, is because I made her promise that she'll come back to me and she will continue loving me through this whole "break." But it's not like she hasn't broken promises or unintentionally lied to me before.

IMO, this is a seriously unrealistic expectation to demand of someone. NO ONE can control how their feelings are going to run, if they change ~ they change, and it is unfair of you to make her 'promise' to come back and love you no matter what and then for you to place blame on HER about broken promises and lying.

I dated a wonderful young man immediately out of a bad break up from a verbally abusive relationship that had lasted 7 years. I really liked this guy. I thought I loved him, but as time passed, I realized I did not. It was very difficult for me to tell him this and break his heart, but I had to do it. It would have been unfair to both of us to live a lie. Him thinking I loved him, me knowing I never would.
Could I have MADE myself love him? No. It is either there, or it isn't...and it wasn't there for him.

Maybe you should take a step back and re-evaluate.
Sometimes, if you give them space, they realize that isn't what they wanted after all and they will rush back in to fill the vacuum.
However, I agree with you about no one gets 'time off' in a marriage and I also feel that holds true for other relationships. If both people aren't commited to making it work, it isn't going to work. Both must devote equal amounts of time/effort to the endeavor. Otherwise, it isn't much of a relationship. It just becomes a ship with two people who each have a paddle and the ship goes no-where because they aren't paddling with a common goal or purpose.
hh