oh! youre a feminist? how cute!

[Clodfobble]

Originally Posted by SundaeGirl

And finally - a friend of mine with a 1 year old daughter is looking at going back to work. The first interview she went to, approx 75% of the interview revolved around her status as a mother and the childcare arrangements she had made/ was intending to make.

But what kind of maternity leave are employers in the UK expected to pay? I know in some places in Europe it's as much as three years! IMHO, they have a legitimate right to try and balance the likelihood of her having more children. If women in any given country fight to legislate more than 2-3 months of paid maternity leave (which husbands cannot receive in their place,) they have to realistically expect that this will influence their ability to be hired.

[kerosene]

SG, what is your family court system over there? If it is anything like ours, it is horribly skewed in favor of mothers, criminalizing fathers from the outset. There are a few exceptions to this, but they are rare. I've seen it damage more than one father-child relationship. I agree with you. It appears that many parts of society have ignored that our lifestyles have moved beyond the 1950's.

[Sundae]

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

But what kind of maternity leave are employers in the UK expected to pay? I know in some places in Europe it's as much as three years! IMHO, they have a legitimate right to try and balance the likelihood of her having more children. If women in any given country fight to legislate more than 2-3 months of paid maternity leave (which husbands cannot receive in their place,) they have to realistically expect that this will influence their ability to be hired.

Originally Posted by case

SG, what is your family court system over there? If it is anything like ours, it is horribly skewed in favor of mothers, criminalizing fathers from the outset. There are a few exceptions to this, but they are rare. I've seen it damage more than one father-child relationship. I agree with you. It appears that many parts of society have ignored that our lifestyles have moved beyond the 1950's.

Both very good points, and things I hadn't considered.

In the UK a woman gets up to 39 weeks maternity pay, whereas a father only gets two weeks and has to meet more conditions in order to receive paid leave (up to five weeks unpaid from what I can tell - it's complicated). But that aside, it still seems a shame to me that hardworking, qualified, responsible women with good references are judged by their commitments to their family whereas men aren't. It seems only a woman has to prove she won't take time off when her kids all get chicken pox at the same time, no-one would even ask the father.

And yes, the family court system is horribly skewed in favour of mothers over here. It's quite heartbreaking that money comes out of my pay packet every month to support children whose fathers came and went, and yet some men who want to be responsible fathers involved in their children's lives are made to jump through hoops of flame in order to do so. A protest group called Fathers for Justice over here have raised the profile of fathers who want access rights to their children - it's a no brainer really. Do we want fathers to support their kids? Yes. Do we want children growing up with parental influence from both parents? Yes. Shall we make things are little less gender biased in the courts... erm, we'll get back to you.

I'm against sexism in general. I accept there will always be cases of separate but equal because men and women are not the same, but I reserve the right to speak out when I think it's unfair.

Oh and I open the door for anyone coming through behind me and step back to allow anyone coming through who is closer to the door than I am. Regardless of gender.