spanking or not?

[sandshoecrusher]

I read with interest regarding smacking of children. It is an extremely touchy subject. When I was a child growing up in Australia my mum never hesitated giving me and my brother a good belting if she thought we deserved it and she was never hit us half hearted either. She would later explain to me what we did wrong and give us a cuddle after. So my brother and I learnt how to respect authority and other people by mostly a few choice words and the odd belting off our dear old mum. And we both still love her.

My brother and I both turned out to be ok, we both have worked hard and have families of our own now and ironically we have both never hit our children and they are all good young people and will be decent citizens when they become adults.

I can't explain it, it was normal practice to smack your child 20 years ago but today it is frowned on. Children can grow up to be decent people without getting smacked provided they understand that mum and dad are the boss and good parents will drum into their children about love, respect and honour themselves and others.

It is funny you mention about schools encouraging children to call the authorities if they are smacked by their parents. When my brother and I grew up in the 1970's and 80's in Australia it was standard practice for schools to dish out punishment to the students if they didn't tow the line. I'll never forget "6 of the best" with the leather strap (3 on each hand) in front of the whole class. And you never ever cried in front of your peers no matter how much it stung. It was always the quickest way to earn respect from your mates. The bamboo stick across the hands or behind the legs was another popular method of torture the teachers used to employ. Luckily for the students corporal punishment was outlawed in 1986.

Was their corporal punishment in US schools?

[Stormieweather]

In my home, I teach that physical and verbal violence is wrong. That there is always another, more intelligent way to resolve differences. If I were then to turn around and HIT my kids, I am contradicting my own teachings and sending them mixed messages.

So I am creative where discipline is concerned. I often use scut work (scrubbing a moldy/mildew'y section of pavement or cleaning out the gutters, for example) or loss/earning of priviledges. I'll unplug your internet, take away your Nintendo DS, disconnect your phone....or give you 2 hours game time, or some special activity together to either reward or discipline my kids. I do not have problems with them for the most part. My 10yr old has some issues resulting from visitation with her dysfunctional dad (my ex), but thats to be expected to some degree. Mostly, she is a good kid. My 19yr old son does not drink, smoke, or do drugs. He has finished high school, has full time employment and is consistantly respectful towards me. My 2yr old is well behaved, sweet, helpful and obedient.

In short, my kids obey me and the law out of respect, consideration and love, not fear (of being hit).

Stormie