The right way to stop a bully

[piercehawkeye45]

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

This kind of parenting creates bullies.

This philosophy is used in almost all martial arts. You NEVER start a fight and try to avoid them if you can but if you are ever placed in a situation where you need to fight, train so you can defend yourself. This philosophy will usually not create bullies but quite the opposite.

Bullies are not created from learning how to fight. Bullies are created when learning and embracing that using force on someone you perceive as weaker than yourself will benefit you somehow.

[Spexxvet]

Originally Posted by lookout123

Wait - I see a pattern here. Someone asks a question... Spexx posts that the discussion is over. I guess he really does believe in avoiding conflict at all costs.

Honestly I think someone has stolen Spexx's login. I've never liked the guy but I thought he actually posted some worthwhile stuff. Recently he is like a clone of TW if you changed the flavor of paranoia and removed the original content.

Oh oh oh, look my stalker troll has come out to play.

[lookout123]

This discussion is over.


Look look, I'm walking away... does this mean I'm growing?

[jimhelm]

[lookout123]

You seriously have to quit losing weight Jim. I like the hair though.

[DanaC]

Originally Posted by Aliantha

I'd also suggest that giving the kid a hard shove or a punch could lead to the same or worse injuries.

I'd suggest that picking someone up, turning them upside down and slamming them bodily onto a concrete surface with a brick wall in the way has way more potential to cause crippling injuries than a shove or punch. Not to say shoves and punches are risk free, but the pile drive move is really something that should only be used when on a sprung surface. Preferably having both had training in how to fall.

Either you're against violence as an effective way to end conflict or you're not.

That's total nonsense. That's like saying if I am in favour of the kid throwing a punch I am equally in favour of him pulling out a knife and slashing the other kid across the face. Violence exists on a sliding scale.

Violence can be an effective way to end conflict. There are times when it is the only way. But that doesn't mean all levels of violence are acceptable.

No disrespect Dana, but why do you get to decide what the right amount of violence is?

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought we were having a discussion and expressing our opinions on the issue. I don't 'get to decide' for anybody what level of violence is right. Nor do you. Stalemate. ffs.

[sexobon]

You can whip me, beat me, make me write bad checks ...

[Aliantha]

Originally Posted by DanaC

I'd suggest that picking someone up, turning them upside down and slamming them bodily onto a concrete surface with a brick wall in the way has way more potential to cause crippling injuries than a shove or punch. Not to say shoves and punches are risk free, but the pile drive move is really something that should only be used when on a sprung surface. Preferably having both had training in how to fall.

All I'm saying is that no matter what level of violence you use, there is a potential to cause serious harm. What if he'd shoved him and the boy had hit his head on the concrete? Same outcome.

That's total nonsense. That's like saying if I am in favour of the kid throwing a punch I am equally in favour of him pulling out a knife and slashing the other kid across the face. Violence exists on a sliding scale.

Violence can be an effective way to end conflict. There are times when it is the only way. But that doesn't mean all levels of violence are acceptable.



Oh, I'm sorry, I thought we were having a discussion and expressing our opinions on the issue. I don't 'get to decide' for anybody what level of violence is right. Nor do you. Stalemate. ffs.

My point is Dana, that you're saying it's ok to go so far, but not as far as that. Why is one thing ok and not another? Maybe the victim had tried pushing himself away in the past and to no effect? Maybe he decided on a definitive ending to the situation. That's what it looked like to me.

As I said, no disrespect intended at all, but I don't understand (honestly), how you can say it's ok to push or punch someone, but it's not ok to use a different level of force.

Oh sure I understand the concept of reasonable force and all that, but seriously, we're expecting kids to be able to make that sort of judgement call when they're in a desperate situation? I don't think so.

[monster]

^wss

[TheMercenary]

I still say, beat the fuck out of the bullies and diminish their base of operation....

[classicman]

Here is the other boy's side of the story.....

[anonymous]

He seems like a smart intuitive kid.

[monster]

Right on Casey. I hope you never need to do that again.