what do you regret??

[homerjackson]

I appreciate your words and the poem. And your right, women can be cold. My wife, for example, did not care to keep in touch with anybody. I still communicate with three of my friends from high school almost on a weekly basis. I also keep in contact with people we have met along the way. She could care less. Although I don't think I want to know what she does from here on out, I am curious because I care. I doubt, very highly, that she will ever contact me.

It's kind of funny, but since she moved out, a song by Garth Brooks called "What she doing now" (I think that's the title) popped in my head. I haven't heard that song for years. Of course, "Unanswered Prayers" by Garth also pops in, and I'm not really a fan of Garth. (Sorry Garth, if you read this)

Right now, I don't care if I get monkey sex (but it couldn't hurt) I would just like the pain to go away (song call "Love takes Time" by Mariah Carey pops in head......Why I have no idea....) I wish that I could find a girl, not so much for a relationship, but for friendship. I lost three people the day she left, my wife, my love, and my best friend. The hardest part about this break up is losing my best friend because I have nobody to turn to, nobody to share stupid stuff, like I would share with her this: Hey, that guy in the new movie Punisher is the same guy from Deep Blue Sea....and she would say....that is cool, now I want to see Punisher...(We loved stupid Shark movies) Just stuff like that. I know it sounds stupid and I know that I'm sounding like a baby that needs to grow up, but that is how I'm feeling. I really have nobody to talk to, joke with, laugh with or anything...and that is tough for me to deal with right now.

And Elspode, I agree totally with what you are saying, I couldn't get into a relationship right now. That would not be fair for me or the next girl. But the part about getting a few laps around the track....easier said than done. I will have to start a thread and get some help with that, since it's been 13 years (dated for 2 1/2 years and married for 10 1/2 years) since I've been in the situation and my confidence is shot.

And, again, sorry for the babbling and I appreciate you letting me get this off my chest, it really does help to talk (write) it out....and it's much cheaper than a shrink.