The Thoughts I Don't Speak

[anonymous]

At times I've understood that everyone shares certain things--being scared, uncertain, needy, but putting on a brave face. Usually I forget this, and assume by default that everyone is above me. My inner dialogue is dominated by negative feelings. I say positive affirmations, and sometimes I can relax a little bit.

But, I don't really face things, I just manage to scrape by, and avoid, delay, disregard the huge task of living the life I have the potential to live. I manage to appear somewhat functional, but my ability to get things done is not good enough, and it's not improving. I'm expending a huge amount of effort just to navigate my inner turmoil. And I'm tired.

I need to meditate, exercise, read.
I need to study, I need to work, I have responsibilities piling up.

I know that things can get better. But... I'll still be me. That's the problem.
I make things hard, and I don't know a better way. I'm tired of lingering between hope and despair. That is the basic overview.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Don't make the mistake of measuring your life and doubts by other people's face book pages. Everyone has that paranoia except the very stupid, and nobody achieves the life they imagine they could.

For example, although for some it's the other way round.

[glatt]

Sounds like you are self aware and know that it's a trap to be thinking like this. But I'll tell you anyway to stop thinking like that. It does you no good.

Originally Posted by anonymous

But, I don't really face things, I just manage to scrape by, and avoid, delay, disregard the huge task of living the life I have the potential to live.

Sure, thinking about LIFE is scary. So don't think about it. Just focus on the day to day. Make the little daily decisions that will tend to lead you in the right direction, but don't think about it like it's some massive journey you are on, with huge consequences. Just take it a little at a time. The big stuff will take care of itself if you just focus on getting the little stuff right.