Aren't You Glad You're an American? - Page 2

dar512 · 10-05-2006, 12:36 PM

Urinals are not necessarily the answer. I'm here to tell you, if you are ever at an archery or shooting range and someone from my company appears, you better run and hide. 'Cause going by the mess under the urinals, these boys cannot aim.

Clodfobble · 10-05-2006, 02:01 PM

I once had a boyfriend who claimed that it wasn't his fault his "aim" was bad, the stream just would not come out straight no matter what he did, and consequently at some point in his early teens he gave up and just sat down to pee every time.

9th Engineer · 10-05-2006, 02:08 PM

How do they enforce a rule like that anyway?? Implications of monitering everyones urination aside, can you imagine getting busted for somethink like that? I'd feel like I'd stepped into the twilight zone...

BigV · 10-05-2006, 11:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dar512

Urinals are not necessarily the answer. I'm here to tell you, if you are ever at an archery or shooting range and someone from my company appears, you better run and hide. 'Cause going by the mess under the urinals, these boys cannot aim.

Might I suggest standing in front of the target? fwiw, their blind epileptic palsied incontinent brothers work at my office too.

zippyt · 10-05-2006, 11:45 PM

might I suggest ,
http://peepee.hfg-karlsruhe.de/pages/pee-tree.htm

Cyclefrance · 10-06-2006, 07:36 AM

Cycling a couple of years back in northern France my pal and I were on top of a steep hill watching somewhat in awe as this very fit French cyclist shot effortlessly up the hill towards us. It didn't end there. He stopped on the brow a few yards in front of us, pulled to the side of the road, and, still astride his bike, whipped out his length and proceeded to relieve himself over the crossbar into the greenery alongside. When he had finished he banged his instrument on the crossbar a couple of times to remove any surplus drops, replaced it inside his shorts and cycled off, giving us a wink on the way. We remained jaw-droppingly speechless throughout the incident. Now that's the way to do it!

xoxoxoBruce · 10-07-2006, 04:56 PM

Why bother? On the downhill he should have been going fast enough to just squirt into the slipstream, the same as a driver propping the door ajar in a car, at 70.

10-07-2006, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Undertoad

I demand home urinals!!!

The time has arrived!!!

This simple solution is cheap, saves water, and solves the seat problem once and for all. It only requires a little space and one more set of pipes behind the wall.

John the revolution!

wolf · 10-07-2006, 05:04 PM

Stunned speechless, rk?

Cyclefrance · 10-07-2006, 07:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

Why bother? On the downhill he should have been going fast enough to just squirt into the slipstream, the same as a driver propping the door ajar in a car, at 70.

...and all this time I thought that was screenwash!

xoxoxoBruce · 10-08-2006, 11:34 AM

You know, cf, I saw a picture of what you descibed the guy doing, in the last couple weeks. Being a still frame I don't know if he banged it on the bar, though.

Cyclefrance · 10-08-2006, 04:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

You know, cf, I saw a picture of what you descibed the guy doing, in the last couple weeks. Being a still frame I don't know if he banged it on the bar, though.

Aah, the agonising incompleteness of the still frame photo...

10-09-2006, 05:03 AM

Issue those handheld plastic urinals that are used in hospitals to the boys. After urinating into those while standing up, they can pour the contents into the toilet with great accuracy. They can write their names on the urinals and store them on a shelf in the bathroom; or, they can make little "gun" belts and holsters for them to tote their urinals around in. Yup, maybe it's time those li'l partners became urinal slingers; also, there'll be a bathroom break for the boys only at High Noon!

10-09-2006, 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

Stunned speechless, rk?

What? I'm a guy.

xoxoxoBruce · 10-09-2006, 06:19 PM

You didn't write anything so she asked if you were stunned speechless by UT's comment.

10-05-2006, 12:36 PM	#16
dar512 dar512 is now Pete Zicato Join Date: May 2003 Location: Chicago suburb Posts: 4,968	Urinals are not necessarily the answer. I'm here to tell you, if you are ever at an archery or shooting range and someone from my company appears, you better run and hide. 'Cause going by the mess under the urinals, these boys cannot aim. __________________ "Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain." -- Friedrich Schiller

10-05-2006, 02:08 PM	#18
9th Engineer Bioengineer and aspiring lawer Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Pittsburgh Posts: 872	How do they enforce a rule like that anyway?? Implications of monitering everyones urination aside, can you imagine getting busted for somethink like that? I'd feel like I'd stepped into the twilight zone... __________________ The most valuable renewable resource is stupidity.

10-05-2006, 11:45 PM	#20
zippyt LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Arkansas Posts: 7,661	might I suggest , http://peepee.hfg-karlsruhe.de/pages/pee-tree.htm __________________ "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner

10-06-2006, 07:36 AM	#21
Cyclefrance Pump my ride! Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Deep countryside of Surrey , England Posts: 1,890	Cycling a couple of years back in northern France my pal and I were on top of a steep hill watching somewhat in awe as this very fit French cyclist shot effortlessly up the hill towards us. It didn't end there. He stopped on the brow a few yards in front of us, pulled to the side of the road, and, still astride his bike, whipped out his length and proceeded to relieve himself over the crossbar into the greenery alongside. When he had finished he banged his instrument on the crossbar a couple of times to remove any surplus drops, replaced it inside his shorts and cycled off, giving us a wink on the way. We remained jaw-droppingly speechless throughout the incident. Now that's the way to do it! __________________ Always sufficient hills - never sufficient gears Last edited by Cyclefrance; 10-06-2006 at 07:40 AM.

10-07-2006, 04:56 PM	#22
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Why bother? On the downhill he should have been going fast enough to just squirt into the slipstream, the same as a driver propping the door ajar in a car, at 70. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

10-05-2006, 02:01 PM	#17
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	I once had a boyfriend who claimed that it wasn't his fault his "aim" was bad, the stream just would not come out straight no matter what he did, and consequently at some point in his early teens he gave up and just sat down to pee every time.

10-07-2006, 05:04 PM	#24
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Stunned speechless, rk? __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

10-08-2006, 11:34 AM	#26
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	You know, cf, I saw a picture of what you descibed the guy doing, in the last couple weeks. Being a still frame I don't know if he banged it on the bar, though. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

10-09-2006, 05:03 AM	#28
NoBoxes Guest Posts: n/a	Where There's A Will There's A Way! Issue those handheld plastic urinals that are used in hospitals to the boys. After urinating into those while standing up, they can pour the contents into the toilet with great accuracy. They can write their names on the urinals and store them on a shelf in the bathroom; or, they can make little "gun" belts and holsters for them to tote their urinals around in. Yup, maybe it's time those li'l partners became urinal slingers; also, there'll be a bathroom break for the boys only at High Noon!

10-09-2006, 06:19 PM	#30
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	You didn't write anything so she asked if you were stunned speechless by UT's comment. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

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