My Evil Fucking Corporate Masters...

Elspode · 03-19-2007, 08:40 PM

...have introduced new filtering software. Not only can I now not access the Cellar from work, but the software appears to be designed to completely filter out anything that might allow someone to maintain any semblance of sanity whatever, allowing employees to now work ceaselessly, productively, endlessly, in complete compliance with SOPs, and mindful of maximizing each and every possible opportunity for corporate profit.

I wonder when they'll start making us pay for the coffee and toilet paper? Why is it that traditional Corporate Mentality cares virtually nothing for employee morale? Why are the things that allow employees to find something worthwhile about their employment always the first things to go when times get tight?

wolf · 03-20-2007, 01:10 AM

Sounds like it's about time to start studying tarot cards during downtime, or perhaps reading from a boldly labelled grimoire, muttering things about toads?

What do you mean, you don't pay for coffee?

Hagar · 03-20-2007, 01:12 AM

We've got that too. It came about after some pretty serious porn incidents. It was probably warranted, but imho the it dept. over-reacted in that now you cannot send or receive any type of image at all (.jpg, .bmp, powerpoint etc) without it being manually viewed and released by the IT crowd.

Slows things down a lot.

wolf · 03-20-2007, 01:30 AM

We lost our netnanny when the IT department forgot to pay for renewing the license. It was actually pretty cool. When you don't pay, you get locked out of ALL websites, since the software can no longer poll the good/bad list or the content filters. Because our new medical records system is a web-based piece of crap, the IT guy had to come in from home (after midnight) to uninstall the netnanny.

They have not bothered to put it back.

Hagar · 03-20-2007, 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elspode

...snip...
I wonder when they'll start making us pay for the coffee and toilet paper?...snip...

Taking a crap on company time is one of the most satisfying things in life...

"mmm, I'm poopin' and I'm gettin' paid for it!"

And corporate funded instant coffee tends to give me the shits, so st the moment it all works out nicely.

Aliantha · 03-20-2007, 02:06 AM

lol that's a funny one. I've never thought about it that way.

At my work you can view just about anything on the server although I think the IT guy checks out what we're viewing. He happens to be the production manager also though, so mostly he doesn't have time to do too much snooping.

I can't view anything from youtube. That's about it though. I can pretty much look at porn from all over the joint except there.

bluesdave · 03-20-2007, 02:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aliantha

I can't view anything from youtube. That's about it though. I can pretty much look at porn from all over the joint except there.

Is that because you cannot get to youtube, or the videos do not play? You might need to download the Flash Player and Shockwave Player. They are on the Adobe web site now: http://www.adobe.com. YouTube videos are all Flash videos.

Aliantha · 03-20-2007, 02:15 AM

It's probably that but it doesn't really matter too much. Most of our work comps don't have sound anyway, and most of the youtube stuff isn't any fun without sound.

I don't have time to spend too much time browsing at work lately anyway which sucks. I'll have to try drinking more coffee though. Maybe I could spend more time on the crapper instead.

DucksNuts · 03-20-2007, 05:19 AM

Viewing and forwarding is encouraged at my work place. In fact, if I view porn and dont forward it to my boss - I get yelled at.

Trilby · 03-20-2007, 07:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DucksNuts

Viewing and forwarding is encouraged at my work place. In fact, if I view porn and dont forward it to my boss - I get yelled at.

Lumberjim is your boss?

Sheldonrs · 03-20-2007, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DucksNuts

Viewing and forwarding is encouraged at my work place. In fact, if I view porn and dont forward it to my boss - I get yelled at.

How is Mr. Clinton these days?

Clodfobble · 03-20-2007, 02:34 PM

I found the best thing to do was start dating the IT admin. Then he let me install instant messaging software on my machine and everything.

Of course if you're not careful, you might end up married to the guy, and then he won't let you install anything on your home PC anymore.

elSicomoro · 03-20-2007, 02:43 PM

At my last regular job, I ran out of work to do a lot...sometimes, I'd go days with nothing to do. So in my downtime, I'd do homework...that was a no-no. Then I started checking my e-mail via my school account (which wasn't blocked out)...then they caught onto me. Then I started surfing the internet blatantly and regularly (nothing I would call controversial)...and they put the kaibosh on that. During all this, they'd give me shit about napping and my 10-minute walks around our campus. Shortly after I got a talking-to about the internet, I left. I just can't sit around and do nothing...I go out of my mind.

Hyoi · 03-20-2007, 03:18 PM

Back in the days of yore (80X86, XX mh, DOS), one was required to buy ones own workstation. Files were passed back and forth on floppy discs. There was no network. Each peripheral had its own stripped down computer and cheap monitor for input. The "IT department" was an engineer or draftsman or secretary that simply enjoyed solving everyone else's hardware and software problems.

It was actually fun. Enter LANs. The help desk became Ivan the Terrible's throne.

Kitsune · 03-20-2007, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hyoi

Back in the days of yore (80X86, XX mh, DOS), one was required to buy ones own workstation. Files were passed back and forth on floppy discs. There was no network.

Ah, yes, President Wilson fondly recalled those days following his second term...

03-19-2007, 08:40 PM	#1
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	My Evil Fucking Corporate Masters... ...have introduced new filtering software. Not only can I now not access the Cellar from work, but the software appears to be designed to completely filter out anything that might allow someone to maintain any semblance of sanity whatever, allowing employees to now work ceaselessly, productively, endlessly, in complete compliance with SOPs, and mindful of maximizing each and every possible opportunity for corporate profit. I wonder when they'll start making us pay for the coffee and toilet paper? Why is it that traditional Corporate Mentality cares virtually nothing for employee morale? Why are the things that allow employees to find something worthwhile about their employment always the first things to go when times get tight? __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

03-20-2007, 01:10 AM	#2
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Sounds like it's about time to start studying tarot cards during downtime, or perhaps reading from a boldly labelled grimoire, muttering things about toads? What do you mean, you don't pay for coffee? __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

03-20-2007, 01:30 AM	#4
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	We lost our netnanny when the IT department forgot to pay for renewing the license. It was actually pretty cool. When you don't pay, you get locked out of ALL websites, since the software can no longer poll the good/bad list or the content filters. Because our new medical records system is a web-based piece of crap, the IT guy had to come in from home (after midnight) to uninstall the netnanny. They have not bothered to put it back. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

03-20-2007, 02:06 AM	#6
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	lol that's a funny one. I've never thought about it that way. At my work you can view just about anything on the server although I think the IT guy checks out what we're viewing. He happens to be the production manager also though, so mostly he doesn't have time to do too much snooping. I can't view anything from youtube. That's about it though. I can pretty much look at porn from all over the joint except there. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

03-20-2007, 02:15 AM	#8
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	It's probably that but it doesn't really matter too much. Most of our work comps don't have sound anyway, and most of the youtube stuff isn't any fun without sound. I don't have time to spend too much time browsing at work lately anyway which sucks. I'll have to try drinking more coffee though. Maybe I could spend more time on the crapper instead. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

03-20-2007, 01:12 AM	#3
Hagar Master of the Domain Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 220	We've got that too. It came about after some pretty serious porn incidents. It was probably warranted, but imho the it dept. over-reacted in that now you cannot send or receive any type of image at all (.jpg, .bmp, powerpoint etc) without it being manually viewed and released by the IT crowd. Slows things down a lot.

03-20-2007, 05:19 AM	#9
DucksNuts Bitchy Little Brat Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 5,067	Viewing and forwarding is encouraged at my work place. In fact, if I view porn and dont forward it to my boss - I get yelled at.

03-20-2007, 02:34 PM	#12
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	I found the best thing to do was start dating the IT admin. Then he let me install instant messaging software on my machine and everything. Of course if you're not careful, you might end up married to the guy, and then he won't let you install anything on your home PC anymore.

03-20-2007, 02:43 PM	#13
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	At my last regular job, I ran out of work to do a lot...sometimes, I'd go days with nothing to do. So in my downtime, I'd do homework...that was a no-no. Then I started checking my e-mail via my school account (which wasn't blocked out)...then they caught onto me. Then I started surfing the internet blatantly and regularly (nothing I would call controversial)...and they put the kaibosh on that. During all this, they'd give me shit about napping and my 10-minute walks around our campus. Shortly after I got a talking-to about the internet, I left. I just can't sit around and do nothing...I go out of my mind.

03-20-2007, 03:18 PM	#14
Hyoi Faithful Companion Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 188	Ivan the Terrible Back in the days of yore (80X86, XX mh, DOS), one was required to buy ones own workstation. Files were passed back and forth on floppy discs. There was no network. Each peripheral had its own stripped down computer and cheap monitor for input. The "IT department" was an engineer or draftsman or secretary that simply enjoyed solving everyone else's hardware and software problems. It was actually fun. Enter LANs. The help desk became Ivan the Terrible's throne. __________________ When you stop trying to make sense of it all, it all begins to make sense.

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