Creative vengeance against a chronic annoyance

[vsp]

A local utility company has had a deadbeat client for some time now. The client in question happens to be a local church. Neither of these facts would bother me, except that the utility company has somehow connected the church with MY home phone number in their records.

Given how I feel about organized religion in general, the notion of someone calling my apartment thinking that it was a church amused me greatly at first... until the collection agents obstinately refused to take "no, we're NOT Church X" for an answer. They'd call at 7:30 in the morning, waking up my wife (who works nights). They'd call in the late afternoon, after my wife had gone to work but before I'd come home, leaving nasty messages on the machine. They'd leave a number to call, which was extremely unproductive, as it yoinked me into voice mail that asked for my account number as a first step. Great, except (a) I've never been a customer of this utility in the first place, and (b) even if I had, it wouldn't be MY account that's the problem.

Every time I spoke to a live human being, I stressed that they had the wrong number. After about six or seven of these, I got a supervisor on the phone and filled her ear with my frustrations, and she finally seemed to get the message. She swore that the record would be flagged, and that I wouldn't hear anything more from them. This worked... for a period of a few months, which ended this morning (AND this afternoon) when they called at the crack of dawn again.

"Of course you know... THIS means war." (in my very best Bugs Bunny voice)

My first impulse was to get a supervisor on the phone again the next time the agents call and I'm at home, and to demonstrate my formidable command of the English language. Then again, been there -- done that -- the calls are still coming.

Any thoughts as to more devious ways of expressing my displeasure that won't get me sued?