I really suck at relationships.

[morethanpretty]

No really, I'm worse than you are.

I have to get up for work at 5am, so I really want to go to bed by 10 at the latest (9 would be preferable). But then, he thinks that he has to go to bed at the same I do and he wants to have sex. I do too, but I'm just too practical, after 9 is really too late to get started on that. I know I should make the move if I want to earlier, but I'd prefer it if he did. I guess its just a confidence boost thing. Other than being sick lately, I also just feel fat and generally unsexy, even if he says otherwise.
I know I'm just kinda generally whining. He is a good guy, things are mostly good. Just feeling...I dunno.
Things are all serious (moved in together and all), maybe I'm getting cold feet. TBH, I don't see us getting married, but I don't see myself getting married AT ALL. I haven't kept this to myself, he knows that I'm not looking to get married anytime soon. There is that part of me though that doesn't believe him when he says he feels the same way about it. Guys are just so much more easier to break but try harder to hide it. It doesn't help that my family (even my heathen brother) keeps telling me that I shouldn't be in such a serious relationship if I'm not ready/willing to marry. I feel like I'm obligated to stay in a relationship with him. Although I don't WANT to not be with him, I still hate this feeling of being trapped.