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Old 01-01-2002, 02:04 PM   #1
Nic Name
retired
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 1,930
New Year's Resolutions

I've been struggling to find a New Year's Resolution that is right for me ... and wow, today I get this email.


Subject: Resolve it and follow through in 2002


As seen on NBC, CBS, CNN, and even Oprah! The health
discovery that actually reverses aging while burning fat,
without dieting or exercise! This proven discovery has even
been reported on by the New England Journal of Medicine.
Forget aging and dieting forever! And it's Guaranteed!


Click here:
http://www.somespammerwhoselinkiwontreproducehere.com


Would you like to lose weight while you sleep!
No dieting!
No hunger pains!
No Cravings!
No strenuous exercise!
Change your life forever!


100% GUARANTEED!


1.Body Fat Loss 82% improvement.
2.Wrinkle Reduction 61% improvement.
3.Energy Level 84% improvement.
4.Muscle Strength 88% improvement.
5.Sexual Potency 75% improvement.
6.Emotional Stability 67% improvement.
7.Memory 62% improvement.


It's uncanny how they know what I need to improve, and precisely how much. I think they must learn from monitoring my Internet activities.


So, this year I'm resolving to do something about SPAM. I'm moving to Spam Motel.

http://www.spammotel.com
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Old 01-01-2002, 02:23 PM   #2
dave
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My new year's resolution is 1600x1200x32x85hz. :P
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Old 01-01-2002, 04:06 PM   #3
verbatim
Vice-President of Resentment
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Pennsultucky
Posts: 199
My New Years resolution is to not make a New Years resolution.






Ah dammit. I broke it already.




(Take 10 seconds to figure it out the joke right now)
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Old 01-02-2002, 10:30 PM   #4
jennofay
..the small and meek.
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: virginia
Posts: 176
i made a resolution last year to stop smoking, but thats the only year ive made one and kept it. and the only year ive made one at all come to think of it.

if i were to make one this year, it would to try and feel better about myself, but then if i were to fail, i would feel worse, and that would do me no good, so i think im just not making one this year.

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Old 01-03-2002, 10:44 AM   #5
dave
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One of the best things you ever did. Now I can stand to have you breathe on me when we crawl into bed.

Oh yeah, apparently it's better for you too.
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Old 01-03-2002, 12:09 PM   #6
russotto
Professor
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 1,788
Quote:
Originally posted by verbatim
My New Years resolution is to not make a New Years resolution.






Ah dammit. I broke it already.
I made that resolution many years ago. I've kept it (by not renewing it) since.
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Old 01-04-2002, 05:36 AM   #7
jeni
is stuck on altair-4
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: santa cruz, california
Posts: 514
aww jenno you are cute.
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